Invisible Strings

Chapter Thirteen

"Alright. I'm out back."

"See you in a minute."

"Okay."

I slipped my phone back into my pocket and tried once more to push all thoughts of Delaney to the back of my mind. I put on the mask that I wore when doing interviews that I didn't really want to do, the one that made sure I looked as if I didn't have a care in the world and that being asked a million personal questions was the only thing I wanted to do. I just hoped that Mama didn't see right through the mask. Because even if I had promised myself and Amber that I wouldn't fight the connection that I felt when the time was right, the last thing I needed was for Mama to start hearing wedding bells in her head, something that I knew she would do just as soon as she found out that I was attracted to someone.

The sound of Barrett and Braylin squealing happily as they rounded the house brought a smile to my face. I seriously don't think that there is anything better than hearing the sounds of a child laugh. It had been their laughs, their smiles, and their love that had gotten me through losing Amber and kept me from drawing myself in a barrel of Jack Daniels. But it had also been their tears, their vulnerability, and their heartbreak that had forced me to strap on my armor and be the man they needed me to be.

I watched as Barrett and Braylin played in the backyard, the puppies that I was beginning to accept as part of the family running behind them. As they played, Mama climbed the steps and sat down in the rocking chair beside mine. She sat there silently for a few moments, watching her grandkids playing. I chanced a glance at her, liking the easy smile that spread across her face as she looked out over the back yard. Losing Amber hasn't been easy on Mama either since Amber was the daughter that mama had never had.

"So, how did your meeting go?" Mama asked after a few moments. When I looked over at her, she was smiling and I realized that the smile she was giving me was one that said she had heard some things. It was the same smile that she'd been wearing when she found out that Amber and I had gotten back together before we;d even told her. It was the same one that she had been wearing when it had been rumored that I was going to be awarded the keys to Jefferson.

"It was good." I said, trying to keep my poker face in place despite the fact that all I could think about was the way Delaney's lips had felt beneath mine.

"I heard it did."

"And what exactly did you hear?" I said, knowing that I was going to regret asking. The rumor mill in Jefferson was in tip-top shape, spreading gossip faster than a flame could consume a dried out forest.

"Well," said Mama, repositioning herself in her chair, angling her body towards mine so that she was looking into my eyes, "Mrs. Cranston called me and told me that she saw you and a certain someone in what she called a 'kiss that was inappropriate for such a public setting' in the parking lot of the school. Her words, not mine."

I groaned loudly as I sat back in my chair and scrubbed my hands over my face. I'd been so caught up in the need to kiss Delaney that I had forgotten how well-known and recognizable I was around her. Of course someone had seen me kiss her.

"Mama–"

"Brantley, I don't care." said Mama, cutting me off. "You are a grown man –even if you are still my child in my eyes. If you are ready to move on with your life and share that big ol' heart that I know you have with someone, then I'm not going to stop you. All I'm going to say is that I don't want you to rush into anything."

"I'm not rushing." I said, standing from my chair. Suddenly, I felt restless and I needed to move.

"Okay. Glad to hear that."

"But I can't deny that I- I feel something for her."

Mama stood from her chair then, stepping in front of me. She lifted her arms and placed her hands on my cheeks, forcing me to look into her eyes as I towered over her. "You have always felt something for her. Even when you didn't want to admit it." She said, a sweet smile spreading across her face. "I remember you two being kids and you would just look at her as if she was the most beautiful girl you had ever seen. But then yall grew up and you started hanging out with a rougher crowd than her. But even when you two drifted apart, even when you started dating Amber, I could tell that there was something there even though you thought you were too cool to show it."

I stepped out of Mama's embrace then, needing some space. I walked over to the railing of the porch and looked out over the backyard, watching the kids rolling around in the grass as the puppies climbed over them happily. My eyes were still locked on them when I finally spoke. "I know it makes me sound like I'm certifiably insane, but I swear I heard Amber telling me the other day –the day that Delaney got back to town– that she would want me to be happy. It makes me sound even crazier to say that I promised her that when I felt a connection with someone that I wouldn't fight it because I knew that she would have had a hand in my happiness."

"Son, there is no doubt in my mind that Amber is watching down over you, wanting you to be happy." Mama said, sliding into the spot next to me and placing her hand over my back. Her hand rubbed gently over the material of my t-shirt. "And it doesn't make you sound crazy. Not in the least. It makes you sound like a man who knows that there are things that happen to us that we can't explain, things that make us realize that there are things out there that are bigger than us. If you say that you heard Amber telling you that she would want you to be happy, then I believe that you really did. Know why?" I looked at her then, silently asking how she knew. "Because I've heard her myself, telling me that things were going to be okay, that we wouldn't always feel the void we have all been feeling."

"But people will–"

"Let them talk, son." Mama said, cutting me off. "They are going to talk no matter what so you have to do what makes you happy. And if spending time with Delaney, if finally acting on the crush you had all those years ago is what you want, then do it. Just do things the right way. Don't dive in head first and then get in your head when things start to get serious." With that, Mama stepped away from me and walked out into the yard where the kids were. I watched as she hugged each of the kids before making her way around the house. It wasn't long before I heard the sound of her car door shutting and the engine turning over, her words with me the entire time.