Would've Been Me (Forgone Trilogy: Part 1)

Prologue

"You don't gamble for something that obviously  is on the verge of losing," like his usual style of sermon, Peter sat in front of me.

I tilted my head and gave him a look, acknowledging his sudden appearance at my "almost peaceful" lunch with a scowl.

"Oh, tapos?" I snarled and rolled my eyes. 

Yeah,  as if I don't know that?

"Do I look like I'll spend my hard-earned money on  something that I'm not even sure of?"

"But you look like you're about to give in to his proposal?" he replied, arching his brow. "You've been  trying to discuss this with me since yesterday. Nabasa ko 'yung  prop no'n, tsk. And I am telling you... his business won't reach that far. He doesn't even know kung saan niya iaalok 'yung services niya," umiling-iling pa siya.

"He already saw the problem when it comes to specifying his targeted market, but his strategies, I believe, can fix that."

"It's not that feasible. Investing a large sum of money would be a gamble on your part."

Mas lalong kumunot ang noo ko habang nakatingin sa pinsan. "How will I know that I'd win if I don't gamble?"

He sighed then shrugged. "There's a really fine line between gambling and  losing, Nadia. If I were you, just drop it before it gets you anywhere you don't wanna be in."

Gosh, he's so serious. Why are we so alike?!

Peter was three years ahead of me, taking up the same program in my chosen college. He was my cousin and among my eight cousins, siya 'yung pinaka close ko. Only because we are both into entrepreneurship, naging business partners na rin kami no'ng highschool. Unfortunately, our business didn't thrive because we mishandled it.

Binalik ko ang tingin sa iPad ko, browsing over the presentation given to me by some businessman who was seeking for an investor. I found his proposition interesting and  also feasible naman. I just don't know why Peter said otherwise.

I  heard Peter's small chuckle. I was actually just ignoring my temper at the moment;  kakarampot na lang ito dahil sa gutom. Pero kakarampot naman talaga ito kahit di ako gutom. I don't know why. Due  to family genes rin ba ito?

"I'm just saying all of these, baka kasi mag-agree ka lang 'dun kay Mr. Ranaiz out of pity," he uttered.

"Am I that maawain to you?"

"Kung 'di ka maldita madalas, maniniwala kang maawain ka talaga," he mused then stood up.

Maawain? Ako rin, mas naniniwala akong maldita ako. Pero hindi rin naman masama ang ugali ko.  Can I just say that it was just because of the circumstances?

Tinutop ko na lang ang bibig ko at hindi na pinatulan si Peter. I opened my email, planning to send my inquiries about the proposal  to Mr. Ranaiz.  I saw Peter picking up his thick  book on Income Taxation and his black backpack, then concluded that he was preparing to leave.

I started typing my queries for Mr.  Ranaiz on my gadget. 

"Alis na 'ko..."

Inangat ko ang tingin sa kanya at tipid na tumango.

"And before I forget, try mo kumain ng pagkain . Baka mas masarap 'yun sa iPad," aniya kaya naman binato ko agad siya ng masamang tingin.

He only chuckled then left my table. Sa malayo ay kita kong sinalubong siya ng isang lalaking may nakasabit na gitara sa likuran. Hindi ko naman 'yun kilala kaya binalik ko na ang tingin ko sa dating ginagawa.

Mabilis kong inubos ang pagkain ko matapos mapansin ang oras. Naghanda na agad ako para sa susunod na klase. Hearing the sound of my heels against the marble floor of the corridor heading to our classroom, I felt powerful. But not for long dahil agad akong sinalubong ng nagtataasang kilay ng professor ko.