MINISTRY SEEKS EDUCATIONAL REFORM
DOLORES UMBRIDGE APPOINTED FIRST-EVER "HIGH INQUISITOR"
" 'High Inquisitor'?" said Harry darkly, his half-eaten bit of toast slipping from his fingers. "What does that mean?"
Hermione read aloud:
"In a surprise move, last night the Ministry of Magic passed new legislation giving itself an unprecedented level of control at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and Wizardry." 'The Minister has been growing uneasy about the goings-on at Hogwarts for some time,' said Junior Assistant to the Minister, Percy Weasley. 'He is now responding to concerns voiced by anxious parents, who feel the school may be moving in a direction they do not approve.'
"This is not the first time in recent weeks Fudge has used new laws to effect improvements at the Wizarding school. As recently as August 30thEducational Decree Twenty-two was passed, to ensure that, in the event of the current Headmaster being unable to provide a candidate for a teaching post, the Ministry should select an appropriate person.
" 'That's how Dolores Umbridge came to be appointed to the teaching staff at Hogwarts,' said Weasley last night. 'Dumbledore couldn't find anyone, so the Minister put in Umbridge and of course, she's been an immediate success —' "
"She's been a WHAT?" said Harry loudly.
"Wait, there's more," said Hermione grimly.
" '— an immediate success, totally revolutionizing the teaching of Defense Against the Dark Arts ("Yeah right!" Percy said.)and providing the Minister with on-theground feedback about what's really happening at Hogwarts.'
"It is this last function that the Ministry has now formalized with the passing of Educational Decree Twenty-three, which creates the new position of 'Hogwarts High Inquisitor.'
" 'This is an exciting new phase in the Minister's plan to get to grips with what some are calling the "falling standards" at Hogwarts,' said Weasley.
'The Inquisitor will have powers to inspect her fellow educators and make sure that they are coming up to scratch. Professor Umbridge has been offered this position in addition to her own teaching post, and we are delighted to say that she has accepted.'
"The Ministry's new moves have received enthusiastic support from parents of students at Hogwarts.
" 'I feel much easier in my mind now that I know that Dumbledore is being subjected to fair and objective evaluation,' said Mr Lucius Malfoy,41, speaking from his Wiltshire mansion last night. 'Many of us with our children's best interests at heart have been concerned about some of Dumbledore's eccentric decisions in the last few years and will be glad to know that the Ministry is keeping an eye on the situation.'
"Among those 'eccentric decisions' are undoubtedly the controversial staff appointments previously described in this newspaper, which have included the hiring of werewolf Remus Lupin, half-giant Rubeus Hagrid, and delusional ex-Auror 'Mad-Eye' Moody.
"Rumors abound, of course, that Albus Dumbledore, once SupremeMugwump of the International Confederation of Wizards and ChiefWarlock of the Wizengamot is no longer up to the task of managing the prestigious school of Hogwarts.
" 'I think the appointment of the Inquisitor is a first step toward ensuring that Hogwarts has a headmaster in whom we can all repose confidence,' said a Ministry insider last night.
"Wizengamot elders Griselda Marchbanks and Tiberius Ogden have resigned in protest at the introduction of the post of Inquisitor to Hogwarts.
" 'Hogwarts is a school, not an outpost of Cornelius Fudge's office,' said Madam Marchbanks. 'This is a further disgusting attempt to discredit Albus Dumbledore.' (For a full account of Madam Marchbanks' alleged links to subversive goblin groups, turn to page 17)."
Hermione finished reading and looked across the table at the other three.
"So now we know how we ended up with Umbridge! Fudge passed this 'Educational Decree' and forced her on us! And now he's given her the power to inspect other teachers!" Hermione was breathing fast and her eyes were very bright. "I can't believe this. It's outrageous. . . ."
"I know it is," said Harry.
But a grin was unfurling on Ron's face.
"What?" said Harry, Percy and Hermione together, staring at him.
"Oh, I can't wait to see McGonagall inspected," said Ron happily."Umbridge won't know what's hit her."
"Oh that would be epic," Percy said cheerfully. "McGonagall would kick her..."
"Language" Hermione scolded him. Percy scowled at her
"Well, come on," said Hermione, jumping up, "we'd better get going if she's inspecting Binns's class we don't want to be late. . . ."
But Professor Umbridge was not inspecting their History of Magiclesson, which was just as dull as the previous Monday, nor was she inSnape's dungeon when they arrived for double Potions. To Percy's disappointment. Snape graded him an 'EE'
"I have awarded you the grades you would have received if you presented this work in your O.W.L," said Snape with a smirk, as he sweptamong them, passing back their homework. "This should give you arealistic idea of what to expect in your examination."
Snape reached the front of the class and turned to face them.
"The general standard of this homework was abysmal. Most of youwould have failed had this been your examination. I expect to see agreat deal more effort for this week's essay on the various varieties ofvenom antidotes or I shall have to start handing out detentions tothose dunces who get D's."
He smirked as Malfoy sniggered and said in a carrying whisper,"Some people got D's? Ha!"
Percy looked over and saw that Hermione received an 'O' What was the difference?! was it the handwriting
They started with a Strengthening Solution. It wasn't bad but it could've done better to Percy's standards
"Well, that wasn't as bad as last week, was it?" said Hermione, asthey climbed the steps out of the dungeon and made their way across the entrance hall toward lunch. "And the homework didn't go toobadly either, did it?"
When neither Ron nor Harry answered, she pressed on,
"I mean,all right, I didn't expect the top grade, not if he's marking to O.W.L.standard, but a pass is quite encouraging at this stage, wouldn't yousay?"
"Hermione what did you get?" Percy asked. But before she could answer he took her homework. "How do you get an 'O' while I get an E!?" he turned to Ron and Harry. "What did you get Ron?"
"I got a P," said Ron, ladling soup into his bowl. "Happy?"
"Well, that's nothing to be ashamed of," said Fred, who had just arrived at the table with George and Lee Jordan and was sitting down onHarry's right. "Nothing wrong with a good healthy P."
"But," said Hermione, "doesn't P stand for . . ."
" 'Poor,' yeah," said Lee Jordan. "Still, better than D, isn't it?'Dreadful'?"
"So top grade's O for 'Outstanding,' " Hermione was saying, "and thenthere's A —"
"No, E," George corrected her, "E for 'Exceeds Expectations.' AndI've always thought Fred and I should've got E in everything, becausewe exceeded expectations just by turning up for the exams."
They all laughed except Hermione, who ploughed on, "So after E, it'sA for 'Acceptable,' and that's the last pass grade, isn't it?"
"Yep," said Fred, dunking an entire roll in his soup, transferring itto his mouth, and swallowing it whole.
"Then you get P for 'Poor' " — Ron raised both his arms in mockcelebration — "and D for 'Dreadful.' "
"And then T," George reminded him.
"T?" asked Hermione, looking appalled. "Even lower than a D?What on earth does that stand for?"
" 'Troll,' " said Percy promptly.
They all laughed.
"You lot had an inspected lesson yet?" Fred asked them.
"No," said Hermione at once, "have you?"
"Just now, before lunch," said George. "Charms."
"What was it like?" Harry, Percy and Hermione asked together.
Fred shrugged.
"Not that bad. Umbridge just lurked in the corner making notes ona clipboard. You know what Flitwick's like, he treated her like a guest,didn't seem to bother him at all. She didn't say much. Asked Alicia acouple of questions about what the classes are normally like, Aliciatold her they were really good, that was it."
"I can't see old Flitwick getting marked down," said George, "heusually gets everyone through their exams all right."
"Who've you got this afternoon?" Fred asked Harry.
"Trelawney —"
"A T if ever I saw one —"
"— and Umbridge herself."
"Well, be a good boy and keep your temper with Umbridge today,"said, George. "Angelina'll do her nut if you miss any more Quidditchpractices."
"Oh I do not want to see that," Percy said shivering.
When they reached the Defence against the dark arts classroom, Umbridge was humming and smiling to herself when they entered theroom. Harry and Ron told Hermione and Percy, who had been in Arithmancy and Muggle studies respectively,exactly what had happened in Divination while they all took out theircopies of Defensive Magical Theory, but before they could askany questions Professor Umbridge had called them all to order and silence fell.
"Wands away," she instructed them all smilingly, and those peoplewho had been hopeful enough to take them out sadly returned them totheir bags. "As we finished chapter one last lesson, I would like you all toturn to page nineteen today and commence chapter two, 'Common Defensive Theories and Their Derivation.' There will be no need to talk."
Still smiling her wide, self-satisfied smile, she sat down at her desk.The class gave an audible sigh as they turned to page nineteen. Percy wondered whether there were enough chapters in thebook to keep them reading through all this year's lessons and was onthe point on starting the chapter when he noticed that Hermionehad her hand in the air again
Professor Umbridge had noticed too, and what was more, sheseemed to have worked out a strategy for just such an eventuality. Instead of trying to pretend she had not noticed Hermione, she got toher feet and walked around the front row of desks until they wereface-to-face, then she bent down and whispered so that the rest of the class could not hear, "What is it this time, Miss Granger?"
"I've already read chapter two," said Hermione. \
"Well then, proceed to chapter three."
"I've read that too. I've read the whole book."
Professor Umbridge blinked but recovered her poise almostinstantly.
