Alitia: Hellfire and Blizzard

I: Slipping Grasp

Carys didn't understand how life could just go on.

She practically collapsed as she arrived back at her bedroom. The rest of her friends had yet to get back, and Carys was almost happy for that. As glad as she was to have people who supported her through these hard times, their presences could get to be a bit too much at times. Carys appreciated their concern, but they were constantly watching her to make sure she was feeling alright, and she would have been lying if she said it wasn't overwhelming when she was already struggling with so much. 

Carys turned her gaze up to the ceiling of her room with a frown. Her facial muscles were starting to hurt from frowning all the time, but she had gotten so used to the pain that Carys didn't even bother with trying to fight it. All that would do was make her realize in more detail how little she was smiling, and by extension, how unhappy she was these days. Carys didn't want to touch that subject with a ten foot pole if she could at all avoid it. She wouldn't be able to outrun it forever, but that wasn't going to stop her from trying. 

Two days had passed since the announcement about the queen of Pyre declaring war against Etruna. In that time, absolutely nothing had happened. Carys didn't know if that was better or worse than the world caving in on itself from a sudden burst of activity. The suspense was miserable in its own way though, and Carys found herself constantly wondering when something would change and how bad it would be. She had grown used to her own suffering ever since the civil war on Etruna began, but this was much worse. Carys hadn't thought a situation could make her more miserable than her battles against her mother had been, but she had been proven wrong so swiftly that it almost hurt to think about. 

Carys didn't like thinking about the war if she could at all avoid it. Granted, she couldn't really keep her thoughts from straying in that direction because of how much was happening and how quickly it had all kicked off, but she would still try her best to think of anything else. It would at least help her to feel like she was in control of her circumstances even if it wasn't by much. Carys didn't think she had ever felt this helpless, and that was one of the worst parts of it all. She couldn't even charge off to Pyre or Etruna to do her best to help out. There was just nothing she could do. The world was waiting to collapse in on itself, and Carys had no choice but to stare at it from afar and pretend she felt nothing for it. 

Carys didn't understand how the world could just keep moving on after an announcement like that. She had woken up on the morning of the war's announcement feeling like something was wrong, but she hadn't quite put her concern to words. The truth of the matter was that she didn't know how to say that something was bothering her because she barely knew what it was in the first place. Now, Carys knew intimately well just how far she had fallen from grace, and it was all she could think about. Of course it was all she could think about. It was like nothing else mattered. Her home planet was at war again, and there was nothing she could do about it. The world just kept moving, and Carys hated it more than anything. 

At the same time, Carys didn't know how she would have handled things differently if she had been in a position of power to do so. She wanted to say that she would have taken everybody off to war to handle the battle against Pyre as soon as she could. She wanted to believe that she would be strong enough to fend off a foreign army trying to swoop in and take control of her home from beneath her feet... But Carys already knew that she was thinking too highly of herself. She had been humbled massively since coming to Alitia, and whether she liked to admit it or not, she knew where her limits rested. Carys couldn't overextend and risk being captured, especially without her mother's name there to deliver her from danger as it had helped her back on Igni when she was taken in by Faerner. There were no securities to be found anymore. All that mattered was the continued aggression of Pyre against Etruna, and there was nothing Carys could do but face it with a smile on her face and hope that everything would somehow find a way to get better soon.