Secret Sessions

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      ⚠️WARNINGS: Eating disorder, purging and mention of eating disorder⚠️

I wake up bright and early cause I need to get ready to go see Taylor!! I'm freaking out. I got ready quickly putting on my Reputation crop top with my baggy jeans. I decided to leave my straight hair down and add a dark green bow into it. I do my makeup and grab my bag and run outside into Jackson's car. It was now 10am and me and he wasn't dropping me off till around 11:50am at the hotel. He starts driving and parks his car near Central Park. I look over at him and shyly smile. He smiles back.

"Hello beautiful" Jackson says to me.

I felt butterflies in my stomach but replied with:

"Hello Jackson" I look up at him smiling.

He leans back his seat and picks me up and puts me on top of his lap. I look down at him bitting my lip. He looks up at me with a devilish smile. He pulls me by my waist closer to him and draws his lips into mine. He kisses me with passion and force. I kiss him back passionately and feel butterflies in my stomach. He slides in his tongue and I allow it. I pull my body closer to his and let out soft moans from the kisses. He stops kissing me from my mouth and heads towards my neck. The kisses are warm and soft he then goes closer to my collarbone and then heads back up to my lips. God damn. I love this man... I really do. His kisses going harder and harder and I keep letting out moans. Soon enough he stop and looks up smiling at me. I look down and wink at him flirty. He pulls me off of him and back into the passenger seat. He leans up his car and starts his car. I still can't believe i'm going to see Taylor.. the person who always made me feel safe and  happy and I just love her so much. So fucking much you don't understand. On the way there I was so excited and anxious that I felt sick... My head started spinning and I got very lightheaded. I really hope I don't faint. That would be bad since I haven't eaten anything in like 4 days. Fuck.

"Babe?" I asked Jackson.

"Yes my love" He said.

"D- do you have any water?" I stuttered trying to say.

"Yes ma'am it's in the back."

I reach over the seat and grab the water in the back. I drink most of it saving the rest of it for the bus ride. We get to the hotel and Jackson gets out the car opening the door for me. I stand there in front of him extremely dizzy. I look up at him and then give him a hug goodbye. He wraps his hands around my tiny waist and kisses me goodbye before getting back into his car. I walked into the hotel and told them the code they gave me and walked into a huge room with a bunch of other swifties. I was anxious and was most definitely going to pass out within the next 10 minutes. I found a seat in the room and this nice looking girl walked over to me smiling.

"Hello I'm Alexis" She says smiling.

"Hey i'm Amelia" I smile back trying to stay focused.

"Want to be friends?" She asked me.

I nodded and she smiled down at me since she was taller than me.

"What's your favorite song?" She asked.

"All too well 10 minute version" I smile and she screamed.

"Me too!" Which caused people to look at her and we laughed.

Soon everyone was gathering on the bus with this nice lady named Sarah. Alexis took the seat closet to the window and I sat in the alley way. The bus started moving and everyone was getting excited to see Taylor. I remember hearing everyone screaming when my vision went black and I fell into the aisle of the bus unconscious. I wake up to the bus stopped everyone staring at me and Sarah on the phone with someone telling them I fainted. She noticed I woke up and headed me my water. I took some sips slowly. I then started feeling guilty like I was wasting peoples time.

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