dooriyaan

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a/n: during their infamous five month fight

'

Ankit observes priyanka from afar, she was currently deep in thought looking over her script while chewing on her bottom lip. A solemn sigh escapes his lips, he feels a sense of bitterness as he recalls the deep fact that they weren't on talking terms anymore.

It was ironic, how currently their onscreen characters were in a great place-they were married and happy, mainly they were together, which was contradictory to their off screen selves, who currently weren't on speaking terms.

Sometimes he finds himself maintaining an on screen hug for longer than needed, just because in spite of it all, he misses her.

he really does.

And he was mad at himself for feeling this way. He was slowly growing terrified of how much she meant to him, at first he thought she would just be a co-star- maybe a good friend- but soon she grew very close to him and he started relying on her and even to this extent, he was good with it, she was someone he valued in his life but now, things felt different- his feelings were different.

He wasn't supposed to grow this attached to her, nor was her presence supposed to be etched so deep into him either. He had felt this familiar feeling of heartbreaking and he was done with it. It had led him into a bad phase and he was done drowning, so he had begun to resent the whole idea of falling in love and getting married in general.

He didn't despise love, he was rather fond of it but he had come to terms that it wasn't for him. Marriage on the other hand was something different altogether, it was another thing which he felt was good for others not for him, but unlike his fondness for the thought of love, marriage was something he rather didn't believe in- nor liked.

"Ankit, the scene starts at five" his director calls.

ankit walks to his position for the scene. He sees priyanka walks towards him too, and he looks away as she stands rather close to him in her designated position for their scene together. They weren't unprofessional by any means, and always gave their hundred percent to their work as well as behaved amicably around castmates and the small mandatory get-togethers.

"Cut" the voice breaks them out of character, and the bright smiles start to dim significantly. Priyanka turns away almost immediately as if she couldn't bear the thought of another moment in his presence, and he isn't any different as he takes a few steps back.

He doesn't see her much around their apartment complex either, she used to stay with him for most of her time but now she avoids him altogether. The worst part is that she isn't doing anything forced either, it all comes naturally as if it's her choice to move away from him- for good.

When they get news that the show is wrapping up in two months, he feels another pang in his heart. one that tells him that now he won't even be able to live the gift of seeing her everyday or being near her. Grief marks his handsome features and his eyebrows furrowed together while he smiles tight lipped in acceptance. He can see that she's shaken too and he doesn't know if it feels like a victory, at the thought of her possibly missing him as well but he can't mask in that glory because the pain in his heart weighs over everything else.

"I think priyanka is seeing someone, i heard from isha" abhishek tells him, while chewing some chips.

Ankit is midway sip on his beer, and he almost spits it out at abhishek's words. "Kya?"

"Yeah i think she might have a boyfriend" he tells her casually, like he was informing him of bad weather.

This piece of information does not sit well with Ankit, at all. He takes another swig of his beer, and this time the liquid seems to scald his tongue and burn his throat. He feels a jab at his heart, and a painful sensation crawls up his skin as his mind hyperimagines priyanka being happy with an unpleasant faceless stranger.

"Ankit!" abhishek's voice breaks him out of his thoughts, "you were about to break that bottle! Are you crazy?"

"Oh" ankit loosens his grip and discards the bottle to the side. he tries reasoning with himself, it wasn't like she wasn't going to stay single forever.

this was bound to happen.

"anyways i hope she's happy, and you don't stress too much. We all might not see each other much after the show ends so you won't have any awkward run-ins" abhishek laughs, completely clueless about the reason behind ankit's newfound anger.

he locked his jaw and his eyes are defiant, as he thinks back to all the times she was glued to her phone, she was probably texting her boyfriend he thinks bitterly. He knows that he has no right to feel jealous, they weren't even friends now.

And this was good, it wasn't like they had a chance anyways. They were two different people, who wanted two very different things from life, and she deserved all the world's happiness which he would never be able to give her anyways. Plus it wasn't like he was in love with her or something?

of course he was.

'i'm not in love with her' , he consoled himself. This was a good thing and he always wished her happiness, even if they weren't on talking terms. but as he let the information, that she was with someone else, sit with him- he started to feel a sense of loss. that something very dear to him had been stolen, and it was him who had made it easier to be taken.

maybe it was high time, he ended their feud. 

it's based on what nimrit said in the first episode of big boss, she told ankit that the last time she met priyanka, priyanka was seeing someone- and that brought inspiration to write down whatever this is. 

tell me your feelings <3

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