I was eating dinner with Dad, Papa, and Eri. *DING* I look at my phone to see who's messaging me, and of course, it's Izuku.
Phone
Izu: Do you think a human hand would be tasty?
Toshi: What is wrong with you?
Izu: A lot of shit is wrong with me
Toshi: Understandable, but why are you asking me this?
Izu: You know those hyperrealstic cake videos on Tik Tok?
Toshi: Yeah I love those!
Izu: Well I saw one of those and it was a human hand but as a cake, and I got curious.
Toshi: So it started with cake?
Izu: Yeah pretty much!
Toshi: Well I gtg I'm eating dinner with my family.
Izu: Okay, tell your Papa don't burn the house down without me!
Toshi: You don't even know where I live? But okay.
Real life
Papa: Shinso?
Me: Yes Papa?
Papa: Who's that?
Me: A friend.
Papa: MY BABY HAS FRIENDS!
Me: I said 'Friend' not 'Friends' .
Papa: Aw man!
Me: Oh Papa!
Papa:Yes?
Me: My friend said don't burn the house down without him.
Dad looked at Papa, and Eri looked at me and did the grabby hands. I walked over to her and picked her up, and take her up to her room and help her into her PJ's then tuck her into bed I read her a story called 'Good night moon', it was my favorite when I was her age. When she falls asleep I make my way downstairs to see dad holding Papa by the ankle with his capture weapon.
Dad: Hey Toshi?
Me: Yeah dad?
Dad: Who were you texting?
Me: My friend?
Dad:Well what's his name?
Me: Izuku Midoriya
Dad: How'd you meet?
Me: I texted a wrong number.
Dad: Do you hear how dumb that sounds?
Me: I guess, now that I think about it. Heh, well Imma head upstairs. Night dad!
Papa: SHINSO YOU TRAITOR! HELP ME!
Dad: Night Toshi.
I head up to my room when *DING* it's Izu!
Izu: Hey Toshi!
Toshi: Hey Izu!
Izu: Whatcha doin'?
Toshi: Heading to my room. How bout you?
Izu: Sitting in a police station!
Toshi: WTF?! What did you do?
Izu: Tried to kms
Toshi: YOU DUMBASS!
Izu: Are you mad at me?
Toshi: No, I'm sorry.
Izu: Thank God! Wanna see a picture?
Toshi: Sure.
Izu:
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Toshi: Oh wow! You look like a piece of living broccoli.
Izu: NO I DON'T!!! 😡
Toshi: How about I show you what I look like?
Izu: YES!
Toshi:
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