𝐅𝐎𝐎𝐋'𝐒 𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃, chris sturniolo

031.

"There isn't anything going on with you and that Conrad guy, right?" Matt asks slowly, as if he's carefully wording his question. He looks at Bianca's blank stare, not sure what to make of it.

"Um, no," Bianca flickers her eyes back to Matt. "Why?"

"It's just... I saw you at the diner with him after you left our house when you slept over. I was gonna get food to bring to Elle, and I was at the parking lot when I saw you but I left 'cause Elle changed her mind. I- I just don't want to see Chris get hurt again. He's a bitch, I know that, but it's nice to see him be himself again."

Bianca takes in every word Matt uttered out in his little tangent, blinking slowly. She had no clue that Matt saw her with Conrad that morning, and she fears that Matt probably believes she's being unfaithful to Chris.

"Oh."

Bianca couldn't think of anything else to say other than oh. She knows how bad it looks—to be caught somewhere else with another boy, especially when it was Chris' own brother who saw her. With steady eyes, she glances at Matt whose face is unreadable, just like his brother's.

Telling the truth wouldn't hurt, right?

"You- you don't have to explain it to me if you don't want to," Matt breaks the uncomfortable silence, playing with the loose thread hanging from his sweatshirt. "But, I'm just looking out for Chris."

"No, um," Bianca fiddles with her fingers, her gaze trained on her lap. "You might as well know the truth since you already saw me."

God, I'm the worst at keeping secrets.

Matt remains silent as he waits for her to go on, confused on what it is that she's been hiding for God knows how long. He watches as her body language changes from relaxed to tense—fingers restless against the fabric of her sweater, eyes trained on her lap, teeth sunk into her inner cheek.

"Bia, you don't have to tell me if-"

"Chris and I aren't really together. We've been pretending for months and yes, I was seeing Conrad but it was only for a little—we never really made it official. I just said we were together to Chris because it was easier than saying 'we're just talking' and we never really were because he ghosted me for God knows how long but now, I'm done with Conrad because I realized that it's Chris who I truly like and I don't know what to do or how to act!" Bianca manages to spit out in one breath at the speed only Lorelai Gilmore could speak, her gaze lifting to look at Matt with desperation for help behind them.

Matt's eyes widen at the confession, expecting it to be something but not that. Clearing his throat after a few moments, he shifts in his seat. "How... exactly did you guys end up in this situation?"

Bianca sighs, her eyes dropping to her nails as the memory replays in her mind. "I don't know, honestly. I just remember Amyra asking me if Chris and I are together and my stupid self said yes. I don't know what possessed me to even say yes!" Her hands cover her face, groaning at her foolishness; letting the what-if's consume her as she thinks about how different her situation would've been if she didn't lie to Amyra.

Bianca sighs, reflecting on how the past few months have been for her. In each memory, a moment in which Chris had called her by his favorite epithets for her—baby or sunshine—plays in her head, making a tint of maroon creep up to her cheeks. Though she had expressed her bitter feelings for the predicament she put herself in, spending time with Chris began to feel less like a chore.

Being with him became easier.

It was at that point where being away from him for too long felt wrong, and she yearned for him more and more.