strings attached ; firstprince

chapter three

"Yeah, well he did break my heart last October," Henry shrugs, his smile fading as he continues. "It took me a long time to just, open my eyes and realise this isn't what I deserve."

"Love is blind," Alex says in an attempt to be comforting.

"I just," Henry starts, his brows become furrowed and he hesitates for a moment. He avoids Alex's eyes but continues. "I thought, no one else could possibly love me and I couldn't do better. He just made me feel... So small... Every time something hurt me, my feelings weren't valid and he was always the victim. It got to the point where I was afraid to tell him when something upset me."

"Henry..." Alex feels his heart tighten in his chest. He wants to tell Henry that all of his feelings are valid and they always have been and he never deserved that but he doesn't. "I'm so sorry."

Henry continues to avoid Alex's eyes by staring at his fidgeting hands instead. Alex wants to place his own hand atop them. He decides against it. "Is it alright if we go now?" Henry asks, finally looking up at Alex again.

"Yeah, of course," Alex says, sliding out of the booth. When Henry slides out, Alex follows closely behind him as they walk out.

The fresh air hits his face and the soberness starts to kick in. Alex falls in step with Henry, looking at him as Henry stares ahead. Henry's face looks like porcelain under the streetlights, the tip of his nose is a rosy pink and his cheeks are flushed. Alex sucks in a deep breath.

"Henry," Alex says quietly as they walk. Henry looks at him, his eyes glassy and his lips bitten red. "The way you felt..."

"Don't feel like you have to say anything," Henry says, looking back ahead. "I shouldn't have dumped that on you."

"I want to, I'm glad you felt like you could tell me," Alex assures him, Henry hesitantly looks at him again. "I just want you to know that you didn't deserve any of that... Your feelings have always been valid and you deserve someone who doesn't make you feel like you're constantly walking on eggshells around them."

Henry smiles sadly. "Thank you, Alex."

"Hey, what are friends for?" Alex nudges him with his elbow and grins.

Henry raises an eyebrow, grinning now. "Oh, so we're friends now?"

"I suppose so," Alex grins. "I mean wasn't it obvious when I twirled you in a club?"

"Wasn't sure if it's only drunk Alex that likes me," Henry shrugs amusedly.

"Hey, it was drunk Alex who decided he hated you, remember?" Alex smiles as a loud laugh erupts from Henry. "No, but seriously," Alex stops walking, placing a hand on Henry's arm.

"All Alex's like you," Alex says softly. Henry averts his eyes to his feet and sucks in his bottom lip, trying to refrain from a face-eating grin.

A comfortable silence falls between them as they start walking again. All that can be heard is their footsteps on the pavement and the wind that brushes through the leaves in the trees as they both smile to themselves.

"Have you ever been in love?" Henry asks suddenly. Alex thinks for a moment, leaving a short silence.

"I don't think so," Alex tells him honestly. "I've always been too scared of that stuff... Don't tell Nora I said that. She thinks I'm just trying to enjoy the college experience."

"Scared?"

Their footsteps suddenly get quieter and all Alex can hear is his heartbeat in his ears.

"Well," Alex shudders out a breath. "I haven't really told anyone this... But-"

"You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to," Henry interrupts, now looking at him softly. Alex feels like he could tell him all his deepest, darkest secrets when he looks at him like that.

"I want to. You told me something personal, I want to tell you something personal," Alex assures him, their eyes locked as they walk slowly. "My parents are divorced and just the way they spoke to each other when I grew up it just... made me afraid that love wears off eventually and it's only circumstantial. They were so in love when they were younger and now it's like they hate each other and I feel like because I exist, they're stuck with each other in their lives forever and I just feel like such a burden... All they do is fight during family events and holidays and it's so hard to enjoy spending time with the both of them."

Henry looks at him with a vague look, something that Alex hasn't seen before and panic sets in and regretful thoughts begin to form. However, they quickly halt when Henry speaks. "Alex," Henry pauses, his eyes soft and sad. "I hope that one day, someone shows you that love isn't conditional."

Alex laughs sadly, a little embarrassed. "I guess we both need to be proven wrong."

Henry smiles gently. "I guess we do."

Alex feels himself growing closer to Henry the more they talk and it's terrifying. This wasn't part of the plan. Henry finally cut contact with Connor, does he really need to do this anymore? But what if he goes back to Connor?

Alex is interrupted from his inner turmoil by the sound of Henry's shuddering breath. He looks at him to see his arms crossed closely to his chest. Without a word, Alex takes off his leather jacket and holds out his arm with the jacket in his hand.

"What?" Henry says as he notices the jacket.

"You're freezing and your dorm is further than mine," Alex says. Henry's eyes soften as he takes the jacket, putting it on himself. Henry looks at Alex and smiles. Alex isn't sure if he loves or hates the fact that Henry seems to pull off his jacket better than he does.

"Thank you, I'll give this back to you tomorrow," Henry tells him.

As they approach the building, Alex walks past him and stands in front of the stairs that lead to his dorm. He turns, facing Henry. "Well, this is my stop."

"Thank you for a good night, Alex," Henry smiles. It's a smile that makes Alex want to melt on the stairs. Despite the darkness of the night, Henry's eyes still shine like moonlight.

"I had fun," Alex agrees. There's a comfortable silence as they smile at each other in the dark. The conflicting urge of wanting to say so much but being afraid of saying too much causes an ache in Alex's chest. "See you tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?" Henry tilts his head. Alex gestures to the jacket Henry is subconsciously tugging closer to himself. "Oh, right. Of course."

"Unless you wanna keep it," Alex winks. "Smells like me."

Henry lets out a short laugh and looks down at his feet. "I'll have to get it dry-cleaned thoroughly in that case."

"Mhm," Alex hums amusedly. He takes a step up towards his dorm. "Goodnight Henry."

Alex turns to see Henry still watching him, a soft smile on his face. "Goodnight, Alex."

Alex walks through the front door of his dormority block, but not without looking back and watching Henry walk inside his first. Just to make sure he gets inside safely. Of course.