Jezebel |h.s|

Forty Eight

"Are you going to see the fishies with us?" She asks, looking up at me with so much hope in her eyes.

"If you don't mind? I'd love to see the fish with you."

Harry smiles at us, caressing the back of his daughter's head with so much love in his eyes. "What do you say that Bellie comes and enjoys the aquarium with us today, Otter?"

She nods excitedly, grabbing onto my hands. "Can we see the otters?"

"Of course, Ot." I smile, feeling so at home with her. I knew there was nothing to worry about, though, she doesn't know I'm here as the girlfriend.

It's a Tuesday morning, so the aquarium is pretty empty. Harry and I wanted it to be this way, less eyes on us. Plus we had more privacy to answer whatever questions Ottilie may have once we tell her. We don't want her to feel too overwhelmed if things go wrong.

Ottie ditches her dad to hold my hand, and I can't help but notice how often she looks up at me to make sure I'm really there. Harry pays for our admission before leading the way further into the aquarium.

Harry and I keep things pretty clean to start. Ottilie takes about an hour to really comprehend that I'm spending the day with them, so we figured it would be best to start off as "friends." I can only imagine how confused she's been since Adriana came back and I was forced out of the picture.

We talk about the fish we see and which are our favorites. She lingers around her favorite exhibits, saying hi to the fish and copying their little fish faces. I join in with her, letting my inner child heal.

I can tell Harry finds it hard to just act like my friend, especially after everything we've gone through together. He stops himself from holding my hand, he keeps looking at my lips, and don't even get me started on how badly he wants to play with my hair. Which is why while we're alone, watching the adorable little sea otters in their habitat, Harry and I make the decision to break the news.

Ottie sits on the bench between Harry and I, kicking her little feet as she contently watches the otters play. Harry clears his throat a bit as he looks down at his daughter. "Are you having a nice day, Ot?"

She nods with a big smile as she looks up to her dad. "Yes daddy!"

He smiles back, "Good, I'm glad." He glances over at me and I can see the anxiety in his eyes. He wants this to go over well. "Ottilie, I wanted to talk with you about something..." Once he has her attention, he continues. "I wanted to apologize for the last few months. I know it was a lot for you and a lot changed..."

I stay quiet, listening as he talks to his daughter.

"I know things have been a bit confusing, Otter, with your mum coming and I've been working a lot. But that's going to change. I'm gonna be taking some time off work to spend at home, alright?"

Ottie nods, "Is mum gonna come back again?" Her question is full of anxiety, as if she dreads the answer being yes.

Harry notices. "Well Ottilie, she will. She's your mum and she loves you so much. And I know that you don't see her very much, but hopefully things change and you two will be close."

"Where is she now?"

He sighs softly. "Your mum went to go live in California, which is a bit far from here. We had a big talk and she and I decided together that she should go live over there for a bit."

"Why?"

"You're still a bit young to understand why, Otter. A lot of adult things happened and one day when you're older, we will talk about them more. But for now, all you need to know is that I'm always here for you, and so is your mum, even if she's living somewhere else."

Ottie nods, her little eyebrows furrowed still. "Okay daddy."

Harry glances over at me, looking like a little bit of that pressure is off his shoulders. I give him a reassuring smile to let him know that he's doing the best he possibly could. I don't think there's an easy way to explain everything that went down to a three year old.

"Do you have any questions for me?" He asks, running his hand over her hair gently.

She just shrugs. "So mum isn't living with us anymore?"

"No, Ot. That was just for a little bit while she came to see you."

"Oh, okay."

"I know it's weird, Ottie. But family isn't perfect most times. Just know that your mommy loves you very very much." I add, wanting her to feel like everything is okay.

She looks at me, those big eyes melting my heart. "Do you see your mummy a lot?"

Harry sighs softly behind her, giving me a look to say that I don't have to answer that. But I look down at Ottie. "Well, Ottie. My mom and dad live in heaven..."

"Like Grandpa Robin?"

Harry nods, "Yes, Ot, like Grandpa Robin."

She pouts softly. "Mimi misses Grandpa Robin. Do you miss your mummy and daddy, Bellie?"

I nod, "I do, I miss them a lot. But even though I don't get to see them, I know that they love me so much. They will always be my mom and dad, just like your mom will always be your mom, even if you don't see her every day. And mommies and daddies love their babies with all their hearts no matter what happens or where they are."

Ottie wraps her little arms around my waist, not saying anything else. She doesn't have to. I know that she's gonna be okay.

Harry joins the hug, squeezing Ottie between us to make us laugh and lighten up the mood. While his daughter is squished between us, he kisses my head gently and whispers a quiet 'I love you' in my ear. It makes me smile, and as I pull away from the hug, I look down at Ottie.

"I have one more thing I wanted to talk to you about, Ottie." Harry smiles, more sure than ever before about telling Ottie about us. Once he has her attention, he continues. "What do you think about Bellie coming over for dinner after we're done at the aquarium?"

She smiles big, nodding quickly. "Can she?"

"I can, Bellie. I missed hanging out with you, Rory too."

"I know we haven't seen much of Bellie lately, but if it's alright with you, Otter, I think Bellie is gonna be over a lot more now. How does that sound?"

She nods quickly, grabbing onto my hand. "Can she sleep over, daddy?"

He chuckles at his daughter's enthusiasm. "Bellie can sleep over whenever she wants to. I would like that very much." He can't help himself, leaning over to kiss my cheek gently. Ottie gets the hint, her smile only growing at the sign of affection.

After another big group hug, Ottie runs to go look at the Otters for a few more minutes before we move to the next exhibit. Harry scoots closer to me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as he presses another kiss to my head. I lean into his side, smiling.

"That went great." I look up at him.

He hums, a soft smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "It did. But I do hope you realize that if you're sleeping over, you're sleeping in my bed."

I giggle softly, "I don't know, I think Ottie's gonna steal me away."

"Not a chance." He grins, leaning down until his lips are pressed against mine.

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slowly healing <3

gab