Backyardigangsters

Something isn't right here

It was early the next morning and Uniqua and Tyrone haven't spoke about the night before. Tyrone left for "work" earlier than normal. Uniqua knew something was up, and she's going to figure it out. On the phone she got a voicemail from Tasha. "Hey Uniqua, I'm going to have to take a rain check on our lunch plans, something came up, sorry but call me when you can!"

Uniqua knew there was a problem. Tasha never cancels on their plans. "These shady ass people" Uniqua said to herself. Now that she had no plans she thought she might as well call Austin and chat. Austin also happened to be Tasha's boyfriend. They break up and then get back together almost every week. The phone rung two times and there was no answer "Ayy it's ya boy Austin, sorry I'm not answering, I'm probably off stealing yo girl, hit me up later fam!" Uniqua decided to leave a voice mail, "boy if you don't get your skinny purple kangaroo ass up and pick up this damn phone I'm gonna unleash a can of whoop that ass, and we all know you're not stealing anyone's girl because you're with Tasha this week anyway call me later homie!"

"I can't deal with these people thinking they're relevant, they're not going anywhere in life, only I am because I'm bomb as fuuuck!" Uniqua thought to herself. She decided to take a nap until all of a sudden, she heard a loud ass noise outside. "What the hell is wrong with these people, disturbing Queen Uniqua while she's trying to get her beauty sleep? How else do these motherfuckers think I stay so gorgeous and flawless?"

Uniqua decided to go check outside, it ended up being her Mexican gardener Pablo. "Pablo, what the hell? it is 7:04 in the morning!"

"calmar su culo hacia abajo" Pablo responded.

"What the fuck did you say Pablo, speak English we're in America!"

"I said calm your ass down!" Pablo said with a thick accent.

"Boy, have you done lost your mind? did you forget who pays you your motherfucking dough and brought your ass over the border from Mexico?" Uniqua yelled and clapped her hands on a ghetto fashion
"ay ay ay, no wonder Tyrone is.." Pablo started and then caught himself "never mind I've said too much"

"boy if your little blue penguin ass doesn't tell me you're fired and I'm gonna get you shipped back to Mexico by telling Immigration services you're an illegal immigrant!" Uniqua threatened.

(No offense to Mexicans, I have no problem with them whatsoever :) )