By Chance

"I'm Sorry"

I was running and running fast. The wind was in my hair and I could feel the rain pouring down on me. If I was jogging at a park, I would’ve enjoyed it but at this moment I can barely feel it. There was a place I have to go. There was someone waiting for me. I have to get to him. I was drenched and whimpering. Was I crying? Or was that just the rain? A strong feeling of worry and sadness overwhelmed me but I kept on running.

It was nighttime and the streetlights were of no use. It was terribly dark and the storm wasn’t helping. The lightning gives me a little solace—a source of light but at the same time I dread it for I know a boom would come after. This part of downtown was deserted. No one was on the streets. Even the homeless didn’t stay here. I could feel something in my chest and I knew exactly what it was: fear.

I was all alone. How did this happen? Why would anyone do this?

I stopped in front of an old building. It was big, like a warehouse. On the metal door was a painted number one. This was the place. I clutched the rusted doorknob and went inside. The broken windows and leaky roof allowed rain to come inside and the floor was slippery but I didn’t care. I was still running and running. Where was he?

I can make out large boxes and crates all over the place but there was no sound. All I could hear was the thunder outside. Was I too late?

I heard a moan and I followed the sound. I wasn’t running this time. I had to keep silent. I kept walking for a while, unsure if I was going the right direction but then I saw a figure about twenty feet away from me on the floor.

“Daniel,” his name was on my lips but I couldn’t say it. There was another figure standing above him and it was pointing something at him. A gun. I could tell it was a man. I gulped. My heart was beating too fast and I could feel it in my chest. I was too scared that the man would hear it. I took one step closer, just one but my sneakers squeaked. I froze.

The figure turned towards me and I couldn’t see the shape of his other arm holding the gun. My eyes widened when I realized he was pointing it at me.

Daniel turned towards me as well and he moved so slowly and I could tell he was in pain. Why can’t I move?

There was a sudden burst of light. A small spark that came with a loud boom.

I didn’t scream or struggled. I didn’t feel anything. There was no pain. I fall down to my knees and at that exact moment there was a lightning and I saw the Daniel’s eyes. It was for a brief moment but it felt longer. It lasted like a minute and at that time, I let my eyes memorize his face. My Daniel’s face.

I remembered how his eyes would cause me to zone out. Every time I look into them I felt like I was swimming in deep chocolate pools. I looked at his straight nose that I used to trace at night before we sleep and pinch in the morning to wake him up. Lastly, I look at his lips and I remember his kisses especially the stolen ones when our son or our parents weren’t looking.

I didn’t feel my head land on the ground but I saw the world tilt before my eyes. Another flash of lightning ahead and what I saw will forever haunt me. The figure was closer to me know and though I didn’t make out his face clearly, I saw his eyes. They were startlingly blue and it’s a familiar shade that I’ve seen somewhere before but that doesn’t matter. Nothing else matters except my Daniel.

I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.

“I’m sorry,” the words never left my mouth.