Yudhishthira's Burden

How will he react?

"NO NO NO. Bad idea. Very bad idea. Subhadra no shush.", Devika blabbered. "Listen naaa", Subhadra tried to pacify Devika. "Look, he feels that he cannot recognise himself, he needs to find something he himself, not the king, not the son but just him, he has to hold onto. This is the chance to let him recognise it and hold onto it. The moment he understand how much he needs you, he'll hold onto you and then eventually to everything else he needs and loves. Try toh karle, what worse will happen?"

"I feel like this is a situation where the blind is leading the blind but okay- I do need to get him to react, I need some reaction, some other feeling out from him. I have a very bad feeling about this, but okay. Here it goes.", Devika blabbered while Subhadra applauded herself for the idea.

"Also, Devu... you might have to handle an aggravated reaction, don't worry okay, it's for the best if he lets out his feeling, talking of which, I'll go prepare for this plan. Thank me later.", Saying so Subhadra skipped away. 

"I love this woman.", Devika chuckled and began preparing herself for the day, and the plan. 

Yudhishthira's POV

I woke up, covered with a dupatta. My head was on a pillow while I was in the balcony of my room. I held the dupatta in my hand close to me and then last night's happenings flooded my head. At least she doesn't hate me...

Getting myself ready, I went towards the dining area, I needed to have something since I hadn't had lunch or dinner yesterday. While going towards the dining hall I heard a few maids gossip. 

"I have heard that Rajkumari Devika has already made her choice, even Maharaj seems pleased with her choice, though no official announcement has been made, but it's very clear who the princess is inclined towards..."

"Haan haan, they are talking like love birds too, I just saw them in the dining hall. I pity the other princes.", the other maid whispered and all of them started giggling. What? 

I soon reached the dining hall only to see Devika and the Prince of- some kingdom I have no interest in knowing- together chatting and... feeding each other. Everything last night- was a dream?

I feel numb, and dizzy. My mind was slowly entering a blue funk. I felt totally blank. I don't know anyone here. I don't recognise myself. I felt foreign to everything- 

I dragged myself to the dining table and Devika got up to serve me. She looked at me briefly, but my eyes couldn't focus. Everything was spinning. I drilled my eyes on my food and ate it quietly. Devika's laugh was still honey to my soul, but the prince's laugh burnt my soul. 

Looking at Devika's smile etched over her face and her hands held by another man, I felt my confidence and sanity being robbed away. Maybe I am not the one to be loved, I don't deserve that kind of love... any kind of love, maybe. 

Maybe I wasn't sufficient, ever. 

I ate as quick as it was possible. Before getting up, my eyes met Devika's, despite my heart burning, I gave her the warmest smile I could, just so I could be her friend, for the last time. 

POV ends

He looked at their joined hands, their smiles in sync, Subhadra indirectly teasing the two... and he lost. The lover in him had failed and lost, he felt his belief in love faltering, his confidence faltering, his heart shattering-

He turned to leave when he heard the king announce, "And now I would like to announce the task to be undertaken by the princes for the Swayamwara. The Swayamwara will be held tomorrow, so each one of you get an entire day to prepare for it, and the task is..."