Kya Haal Mr. Panchaal?

Kunwara Kanhaiya

"Shaadi ho kar rahegi.com park aur ladki ka request aaya hai." He said showing her the laptop. "Band kar ye mara internet." Kunti said closing the laptop before continuing," aese effect karke photu daalte hain ki umar ka pta hi nhi chalta. Pichli baar jise ladki ki maa samajh ke baat kr rhi thi vo to khud hi ladki nikli. Main bhi sochu ki Ranbir Kapoor, Shahid Kapoor ke jamane mein konsi ladki apna favourite actor Dilip kumar btayegi." Kanhaiya tried to control his laughter.

"Arey arey par maiya. Ek baar to dekh le na maiya." Kanhaiya insisted. "Dekh lo sasu ma, ab to takiye pe bhi ban aai hai." Pratap said entering the scene and Kanhaiya took one step towards him in anger but stopped when Kunti stopped him.

"Tu tension mat le lalla, aaj ek aur ladki vaale aa rhe hain. Shaam ko, 5 bje. Main mandir ja rhi tu bhi dukan se time pe aa jana." Kunti said and Kanhaiya nodded. "Ek aur ladki vaale? Matlab aaj ohir free ki kachori kha kar jayenge ek parivar." Pratap said chuckling while eating namkeen.

"Ae neeche rakho. Ye namkeen kahe kha rhe ho? Aaj vrat ka din hai na." Kunti said stopping Pratap before he could eat the namkeen. "Aaj somvar hai?" He asked. "Nhi nhi, damad ji. Aapke liye to sunday hai. Kaam kaaj karne vaalo ke liye somvar hai." Kunti said sarcastically.

Kunti went to the mandir telling Kusum to wake up for the third time and returned within an hour.

Time skip, (6 PM)

Its been n hour since ladki vaale came and Kunto was taking interview of the ladki. Kusum lifted the girl's face up and Kanhaiya just looked at her. 'O dear God, rani bana ke rakhenge apni dulhaniya ko. Bas aaj maiya ke man ke 6 gun dilva do is ladki mein.' He thought looking up.

"Sundar hai." Pratap commented nd Kusum looked at him. He just shook his head like he said nothing. Kunti tick marked 'sundar' in her diary. "Kahan tak padhi ho?" Kunti asked. "Ji political science mein PhD hu aur ab ek college mein pdhati hu." She answered and Kumti tick marked 'Samjhdaar'. "Itni pdhai isne apne dada-dadi ki seva karte hue ki hai. Apno se bhot prem karti hai. Prem." The pandit said emphasising on 'prem'. Kunti tick marked 'Prem poorn'. Kanhaiya was relieved. '3 down, 3 to go.' He thought and waited for the next gun.

"Beti khana?" Kumti asked. "Meri beti ke haath ka khana khaoge tu uski ungliya kaat loge." Her mother said and then corrected herself realising what she said," I mean, apni ungliya chaat loge." All nodded. "Arey log dahi maangne aate hai aur meri beti ke haath ki bani sabzi donge bhar bhar ke le jaate hain." Father of the girl said. "Arey pure Meerut mein dhai sau donge ghum rhe hain humare." The mother said and Kunti ticked the 5 gun 'Bawarchi'.

"Bhot badia. Beti, puja-path karti ho na?" Kumti asked. "Ji haan." The girl answered and Kanhaiya smiled a big one. Kunti's hand went to tick the next gun but stopped in the middle. "Vrat rakhti ho? Puranmasi ka vrat rakha tha?" She asked and Kanhaiya looked at the girl expectantly. "Puran mosi? Vo to barso phle nikal gyi thi. Kya aap humari Puran mosi ko jaanti hai?" The girl asked and everyone shook their head irritated. "Arey Puran mosi nhi puranmasi. Purnima ka vrat rakha tha?" Kunti asked again clarifying her question. "Aunty ji bas ek yhi cheez na ho nhi pati mujhse. Khaali pet na gas ban jaati hai. Bhagwan to man mein baste hain na to uske liye pet ko takleef kahe de?" The girl asked and Kanhaiya closed his eyes knowing that the girl was rejected now.

"Sahi kaha na aunty ji maine?" The girl asked. Kumti kept her duary aside and stood up. With her, everyone else also stood up. "Mujhe mat btao ki bhagwan kaha baste hain. Aur Pandit ji ap to kh rhe the ki 6 guno vaali smapan ladki hai. Yaha to panchve gun pe hi fail ho gyi. Karva chauth ka vrat rakhna bhul gyi to humare lalla to nikal lenge. Aesi nirguni ladri dikhane laye hain aap hume?" Kunti asked the pandit angrily.

"Bas kariya aap. Kis muh se aap meri ladki mein khot nikal rhi hai? Apne ladke ko dekhiye chacha jaisa to lagta hai ye." He said making everyone's eyes widen. "Oh uncle ji, maiya se unchi avaz mein baat nhi." Kanhaiya said warningly. "Maiya ka bura lag rha hai ya chacha ka bura lag rha hai? Aur itne unche sapne mat dekhiye Kumti devi nhi to dhadam se niche gir jaogi. Laalach bhot buri bala hoti hai. Chalo." The father said before moving out. Everyone except the Panchal family moved out.