Castle | Ghost & König ✓

25 | alive

"Yes, I was in the room, but I was in my box at the time," König responded. "Remember in the bathroom, Jez? I told you that my father puts me in the cage to help with my heartbeat, my cardiovascular system. I only heard bits and pieces, like that you were a witch and shit."

"In the bathroom...?" Johnny wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. I punched him lightly on the arm. König's face flushed.

"It was not..." said König, but he did not finish his sentence.

"Suuuuure."

"Johnny," I wanted, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Jezebel," he replied with a teasing smile.

"Ugh..." I groaned shaking my head. "Listen, this is good enough for now. We've got a solid foundation for how this is going to play out. You both should probably leave."

"Fifteen minutes apart?" said König, about to stand. "Like last time?"

"Y-" I was about to answer him in the positive, but Johnny had already bolted out the door. He shot me a quick wink before he closed it behind him.

"...Thanks for letting me look at the books!" He hollered once he was already down the hall. I wanted to cry. How dare him leave me like that! He was very much aware that König and I were very tense at the moment — I mean, I had never told him what happened, but I guess he must have figured it out for himself.

Once Johnny had left, the room went deathly silent. I swallowed my saliva, bringing my knees to my chest as I stared at the wall ahead of me, avoiding any and all eye contact with König. He was not wearing his mask, for I had stole it from him before he could put it on, so I could see his beauty from the corner of my vision. It made my body feel weak.

König played with a nearby flame from one of the candles, swiping his hand back and forth over it and tapping his foot on the ground. I snuck a glance at him. He took up a lot of the space on the floor. I did not realize how large and tall he was until Johnny had left the room and it was just him and I.

"Are we going to... discuss it?" I began hesitantly. I wanted be rid of this tension between us and go back to the way we were, and the only way I felt as if I could do so was if we talked about what happened.

"What is there to discuss?"

"We made love."

"I am aware."

"Does that not matter to you?" I said, my heart squeezing.

"Of course it does," König said, whipping his head around. His countenance revealed that he felt somewhat betrayed that I would assume such a thing. "But-"

"But what, König?" I interrupted. "Why have you been acting so strange? Was I... bad? Did I do something incorrectly?"

"No... Jez-"

"It was my first time. I was always told to wait until marriage, so I- I did not think it would happen so soon, I-"

"Do you regret it?" said König fearfully.

"No, no, of course not!" I assured him passionately. "I do not regret what happened, not one bit. It was just very soon for me."

"I understand, Jez-"

"I do not even know what to make of it. Not- Not that I regret it, necessarily, it is just the simple fact it happened to me at all, not that it was with you, but that it had happened before marriage. I do not retain the same beliefs I always have, seeing as I am... different... now, but I cannot just rid myself of my past beliefs. I still have confusions and feelings about things even if I do not believe certain things anymore-"

"Jez. You are not making any sense," König stopped me.

"I know," I whispered with a sigh, hugging my legs.

"I-"

"How do you feel about it?" I looked up, getting his gentle gaze. "Do you regret it, König?"

"No," he said. "Never. But... I feel as if..." He glanced away. "I feel like maybe it did not mean as much to you as it did to me."

"Are you serious?" I said incredulously. He nodded. "Why?"

"You've just been so preoccupied with everything else-" He gestured with his hands, and then took one and pushed his hair back with it. "I don't know..."

"Let me show you how much it meant to me," I said suddenly, and then stood up. I put my hand out and he took it, staring at me in bewilderment.

I guided him to step over the candles and we went to my bay window. I drew back the black curtains, grabbed a candlestick, and held it to the window. I jabbed my finger at the window and looked at him beside me. "Look. Look at the fields."

The fields outside my bedroom window were still bursting with color, daisies and roses speckling each spear of vibrant green grass like freckles. It was only one spot, however, the spot where we had made love, and the beautiful vibrancy of the lively grass and colorful flowers was a stark contrast to the dead trees and greenery surrounding it — the field was alive, or at least a portion of it.

I stared at him, waiting for him to make eye contact. Eventually, König took his attention away from the window and looked at me.

"That is how much it meant to me, König," I said under my breath.

Without another response or word of protest, König grabbed my face and slammed his lips against mine. I yelped in surprise, but soon melted into the kiss, wrapping my arms around his neck and digging my hands into his soft hair. I moaned as his tongue slid past my teeth, and I opened my mouth to let him in... I had no clue how to kiss, especially how to kiss like this, and I am certain he did not either, but whatever we were doing, it felt right. He felt right.