how romantic

Part 6

Naru wrote various updates as they occurred, numbering the days and updating Roksu on the progression of the plot. She was quite proactive as well it would seem. She had taken it upon herself to preemptively deal with the bandit situation with the assistance of the knight.

It was clear that she understood Roksu's relationship as 'author' but had her reservations about considering her world to be just a book, which was fair. Roksu couldn't imagine being told one day you're a fictional character and taking the words without complaint or consideration.

...she doesn't seem to trust the knight very much... Roksu knew that he'd written her to be a distrustful and skeptical character but it was strange to read words that looked like they were written by him describing a person who sounded like Choi Han written in such a negative light.

...no, wasn't I like that in the beginning too? When he first met Choi Han and all he saw was a vicious and impulsive old man. He definitely thought that Jungsu's uncle was scary back then. And even when Choi Han showed off his good nature, he still couldn't help but mistrust that.

Somehow that realization sent a cold shiver down his spine.

Naru was in a great many ways his self insert character but the addition of details he hardly remembered to add or think about... he couldn't help but wonder about the other option.

What if we're the same person?

A strange thought but it would explain the connection between worlds. For a person who had transmigrated between worlds twice now, ideas of rebirth or different people with the same soul sounded almost tame in comparison.

Roksu sighed and placed down the book. There was no point in ruminating any more than he had. From his calculations, Duke Fredo should be around to pick up his long lost daughter within a day or two. It did appear that the thirty hour time difference was the most accurate although it was difficult to say for sure.

He'd put it off for long enough. He needed to leave the safety of Naru's bedroom and face the knight. If he dithered in here too long then there was a chance he'd get worried and check in with her and Roksu didn't want poor Naru's privacy to become anymore twisted.

Roksu was careful not to look at Naru's body as he changed out of her nightgown and finally–

Finally...? I'm excited to meet him, aren't I?

Shameful. Ah, and a shame that Naru could bear witness to. How mortifying. It was impossible to avoid the elation building into excitement within his chest, to have the spare thought that he would finally know what it felt like to see Choi Han looking at him lovingly. While Naru fell for the knight slowly, the knight practically had a case of love at first sight. A bit of wish fulfillment on Roksu's end.

So the knight he would meet today was going to be a knight that was already a lot in love with Naru.

Oh.

Right. Not him. Naru.

...is that why I want us to be the same person? If an alternate Choi Han can fall in love with an alternate me, I can pretend that I have a chance with him?

Roksu hoped that Naru would have mercy on him and never bring up his shameful thoughts. He made a note not to give Naru any reason to resent him.

Letting out yet another sigh, Roksu pushed open the door.

"Oh, good morning."

It wasn't fair. The face with that bright smile and those eyes and it really felt like he was greeting Choi Han. Everything about him was the same, even the slight nervousness that Roksu saw from him yesterday, if not for the clear indicators of a fantasy setting he would be utterly convinced that this was Choi Han.

...would look surprisingly good in costumes I guess...

Roksu banished the thought and nodded curtly at the knight.

"Did you sleep well?" The knight asked, a bit fretfully, and it really hit Roksu that even if the knight grew to love Naru, Roksu had no place in this equation.

He wasn't asking Kim Roksu did you sleep well, those words were for Naru and he felt guilty to impersonate her like this. However, Naru hadn't indicated that she wanted Roksu to stop impersonating her when he was stuck in her body and he could understand how the truth would only create more complications than it solved.

"Yes." Roksu replied simply, sweeping past the knight in order to enter the kitchen. Perhaps it was a blessing in disguise that Naru was still cold towards the knight. He really didn't have the confidence to act like a lovey-dovey couple without letting his thoughts stray to embarrassing places, like hand holding and soft kisses, and he didn't want to expose Naru to any more of his depravity.

But it would also have been very sad for the knight if the person who was once warm suddenly became cold.

It was a complicated situation.

As it was, the knight followed after Naru like a puppy as Roksu began to prepare breakfast for them both. According to Naru, she'd managed to obtain enough money to last the month with the loot from bandits but it was still going to be a concern for money without a job... Of course there's always Fredo but it's a bit difficult being financially dependent on someone else. Hm. I really should have written that Naru was independently wealthy.

He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice just how close the knight was following after him until he bumped into him and tripped as a consequence.

Quick reflexes caught Naru midair and Roksu momentarily forgot how to breathe, hugged close against the knight's body. "Are you okay?" He asked, his face red and eyes pinched with concern.

...I want Choi Han to hold me like this...

"I'm fine." He said shortly, pushing the knight away to continue cooking. Doing everything in his power to ignore his own pounding heartbeat.