Learning to walk

✨IVY ✨

Tears trickled down ivy's face as she sat in the dark room. She sobbed silently as she held her knees tightly to her chest; blood rushing down he legs. She took a deep breath, as she attempted to stand up. Her little legs shaking and the pain rushing up her body as she stood up. She hopped to the bathroom where she closed and locked the door. She stripped naked tears still rushing down her face. She slightly stepped over in the shower and turned the shower on; as the water hit her body the blood started to run down the drain.

She grabbed the bar of soap and delicately washed her body. When she reached down to her private area, she stopped and looked Down. She gently wiped and saw the blood on her washcloth. She stood for a good five minutes while she stared at her washcloth. "How do i explain this to mom? Am I gonna get in trouble for this ?". Her thought was broken when she heard a knock at the door. She quickly washed out the washcloth. "Ivy?" Her mom Linda called out. "Yes mommy?" she answered.

"Oh i just wanted to make sure that was you" she replied. Ivy looked underneath the door to make sure that her mom walked off. She wiped her tears and hurriedly finish her shower and then got out the bathroom. Walking quickly to her room and closing the door behind her. She removed the towel and grabbed a underwear from her draw, she then put on some clothes and walked over to the mirror. She stood looking at herself in the mirror trying to figure everything out; she didn't know how to feel or what to feel. Feeling ashamed, embarrassed, broken and worthless. "No one will ever love me again" she though to herself.

She turned away from the mirror and she walked back out the door. Still in pain, she tried to straighten her stance as she walked back into the living room where her family was located. She sat quietly and listened as everyone chattered and laugh as they watched television.  "Hey Ivy, you good?" Ivy looked over her shoulder and looked at her cousin. She smiled slightly and nodded her head. Deep down inside she wanted to die; she felt uneasy and vulnerable. "You sure? cause we been calling your Name but you ain't answer". "Oh sorry, i just zoned out" she replied turning away and continuing to watch the show.

Leon looked at her trying to figure her out. He grew up with her and he knew when she was ok and when she wasn't. Just looking at her, he knew that something was off. She wasn't Being her usual cheerful and fun self. She was quiet and reserve for a while now and he really could not understand why she was being this way. He got up from the couch and headed back into the kitchen where he was cooking up some food. Ivy smelled the curried chicken from in the living room; that was one of her favorite meals of all time but all of a sudden that smell of it turned her off. She got up of the couch and headed towards the door where she was greeted by the man who cut the yard.

She looked at up at him as he steered down into her big brow eyes. She clenched her jaws and looked away at the floor; she turned to her mother who was still glued to the tv screen. "I'm going outside for some air" she said underneath her breath. She brushed passed Howard and walked outside her jaw still clenched . She closed the grill behind her and walked over to her friends house. She lightly knocked at the door and waited for someone to answer. Seconds later the door creaked opened and katelyn head popped out. "Hey ivy what you doing here?". Here Jamaican accent strong as ever. Her smiled warmed ivy's heart as she revealed her pearly whites. "Hi miss Kate, is Mario here?" She asked. She smiled opening the door wider letting ivy inside the house. "Yeah I believe so. Let me call him for you" she stated walking into the back. Shortly after, Mario walked around the corner, She smiled seeing him. Ivy has had a crush on Mario for as long as she could remember. His smile always drew her in and his brown eyes always melted her soul every time he looked at her. "Hey ivy, what's up?" She said smiling at her. She slightly smiled back and shook her head "nothing" she said. "Ok you can come back to my room since its loud out here. She smiled and followed him back to his room.

As she entered, the scent of cinnamon and mint hit her face. His vaporizer steam his room and his clothes neatly folded on the bed. "For a boy, your room is really neat and tidy" she stated as she continued to examine the room. He smiled and shook his head. "I mean i don't really like that nastiness so i try to keep my room as neat and clean as possible cause i know people come over and i don't want them thinking mi a nasty man" he replied. Ivy laughed a little and sat on the chair by his desk. "I hear you" she said. They chatted and hung out for a minute before ivy decided that it was time to head back home. The dogs barked as she exited through the gate and headed back to the house of terror. She stopped by her gate and looked up at the room that the events took place in. Her throat started to close up and tears formed in her eyes. She sniffled a little before finally opening the gate and entering the house. As she walked inside she was greeted by Leon. "Ivy i make some food you want some?" She quickly shook her head no and headed into her room closing the door behind her.

My life will never be the the same she thought; and evidently she was right.

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