The Lone Wolf (K/DA x Male Reader)

Chapter 9: Banked

Y/N POV

Y/N: I still have that gun with me, I don't know why I kept it. I guess it's similar to my dog tags, it represents my achievements, something I did, something I should be proud of. 

Bard: Did you bring it in campus? 

Yes.

Y/N: No, that could be dangerous, I've learned to detach from needing it. 

No, I haven't. 

Bard: Hmmm... good, that's not as bad as I thought...

He sighs, then whistles a soft song. 

Bard: But you aren't proud, are you? You and I both know that those achievements came with a price, those people are accomplishments towards those achievements, the things you done. They call it, "serving your country" but did you serve your country, hmm? 

Y/N: I... I did... I did serve my country. I just did it because I had nowhere to go, turns out I was a good listener, which turned me into a good soldier, an instrument of war, Darius would say I'm a perfect brush for his canvas. 

Bard: Hmm... you play video games at all, Y/N? I only ask in case this might be a... trigger. 

Y/N: I had no forms of media growing up, I never had any social media either, so I never watched YouTube or anything like that. 

Bard: Mhmm... what I plan to do over the coming weeks is to take every assignment or mission that you have done and deconstruct them. We could practice... exposure, knowing what would happen if roles were reversed, elaborating on how Darius used to say, "you should be proud". Acceptance is key in your situation, Y/N, and I want to help you. Do you have any class today? 

Y/N: Nope. 

Bard: Good. 

MORE THERAPY TIME! 

Bard: So, the bank, or should I say, the Noxian depository? Just taking a random one out of my notes here for an example.

Y/N: Me and the three robbers. My job was to get in their heads, figure out how they think, then when the time is right, have them put behind bars. The only reason I was there in the first place was so that the police had no idea who I was, and it's the national guard's job to keep a government building like that safe. 

Bard: So, how do you think it would've gone, if say... you weren't there? 

Y/N: How so? 

Bard: I am wondering, that killing two of those men, you were actually doing exactly what you were supposed to do, and what if something worse could've happened if you didn't? 

Y/N: Hmmm... I never thought about it like that. 

Bard: Which is where I'm getting at with this. This was during a time where Noxus had a lot of enemies, you were following orders, doing what you had to do, think about what would happen if you didn't.

Noxus would fall into poverty, from the cyber-attacks and the attacks on the depository I prevented, those robbers would be rolling in it, then all of Noxus would crumble, allowing people to move in and take over any nation they wanted. 

Noxus is the strongest military force in Runeterra, Icathia, Freljord, Ionia coming up next, so... damn...

Y/N: I never thought about it like that, wow...

Bard: Most people don't, that's what you should do with every scenario you relive in your head, what would happen if you didn't do that. You had a job to do, and you were good at it, so why would you ever refuse or regret. Think of the people's lives you improved with what you have done. The friends you may have stabbed in the back, do you think they would do the same to you if the roles were reversed?