Kissed by Fire: Cal Kestis

Chapter 15

Y/n nodded, managing to make her entire way around the wound to clean it up. A wound like this one would mend with regular appliances of bacta, so it should be healed, hopefully, by the time they made it to Kashyyyk should Mari contact them. She was so focused on tending to the wound, (finally she thought to herself) that she didn't realize Cal hadn't looked away from her face. He was watching her closely, observing the way her eyebrow pricked up slightly when she worked, and how she bit her tongue when she reached a strange placement to work with.

He didn't want to admit it to himself, but he was falling hard for her. Especially since being a Jedi meant that he couldn't form such attachments. He could hear Master Yoda's voice in his head from his lessons as a Youngling. "Remember, Young ones. Attachment, a path to the dark side, it is. Learn to let go of the things you hold dear, you must." Cal remembered how he and his friends used to laugh at how Master Yoda spoke. He remembered the small crush he had on a fellow padawan, when he was training under his Master Tapal. He feared his emotions then just as much as he did now after hearing what Master Yoda had said about attachments. He had told his master about the girl then, and the strange feeling he got whenever he was with her.

He remembered the laugh Master Tapal bellowed when he had told him. It was deep, and yet joyous. He was amused, but as his teacher, he spoke with such a stern tone that Cal knew to listen. Emotions are a natural part of life, Cal. But we as Jedi must learn not to give in to them, but to accept them. You are young, but you will learn in time.

Why did it feel so wrong to just accept how he was feeling? He wanted to act on it. But he knew he shouldn't. He couldn't even be sure she felt the same way as he did. But with every touch of her fingers against his skin, his heart beat quicker and his breathing hitched. A woman's gentle touch was foreign, and one so caring, so intimate, was even more elusive to him. It was like a bolt of lightning that shot through him, until she turned away, and his heart was given a moment of peace to rest.

"Y/n," he softly called to her, gaining her attention from the bacta spray she was preparing in her hand. "Are you okay? After the, uh... Haxion Brood prison, I just-"

"Look, it was bad while I was there, but," she paused and let out a sigh. "It's over and done now. We escaped, and came out, mostly, unscathed." She tested the spray, approaching him with a hesitant and strained smile. "I'm alright, Cal. It takes more than that to bring me down. I saw worse happen to other people down in Coruscant, to be honest."

"Yeah, but this happened to you," Cal emphasized, and shifted with a wince when he felt the warm bacta spray on his wound. Taking a breath, he continued, "What they did to you-"

"Cal, it's over. I'm okay. Trust me, I've been through worse." The fact that she muttered the last sentence made him furrow his brows, but it was obvious she didn't want to talk about it any longer. She just wanted to forget about the Haxion Brood for right now. She finished up his spray quicker than the cleaning, and went to wrap up his chest with the bandages. He lifted his arms slightly to allow her better access, and she finished within a few minutes. "All right, you're all good."

She went to step back as she took off the gloves and threw them away, but he caught her hand in his own. He stood up, but his sudden courage came crashing down as soon as he looked into her eyes. She was confused, hurt, and hiding something within her soul. He could feel it. Their connection. And that was exactly what caused him to lose all his confidence. Instead, he gulped down his emotions and said, "Thanks. For... patching me up."

Y/n gave him a sincere, although confused, smile back. "That is what I'm here for. I didn't exactly do much with Greez and Cere before you came along," she answered, going to pat his shoulder. She realized too late that this would be a mistake on her part, because she felt the hard muscle, and faltered. She took her hand away as quick as she put it there. Brushing her hands together, she quickly said, "Well, it's been a long day. I'm gonna try and get some rest before we get to Taanab."