Farmeed / One-shot Series

~ holding on and letting go ~

"Umeed, meri baat suno, mein tum se baat kar raha hoon!"

"Sunayi de raha hai mujhe aap kya keh rahay hein. Maan to rahi hoon, sab meri hi ghalati thi, aap ko hi sab pata hai. Ainda se jesay aap bolein gay, wohi ho ga. Khush?"

Umeed furiously threw away her purse across the room. Farjaad's eyes traced the purse and then turned back to face Umeed as he inhaled a sharp breath.

"Umeed, tumhein pata hai mein ye nahi keh raha. Mein sirf ye keh raha hoon ke agar mein tumhein koi baat samjha raha tha, to sun lenay mein koi harj nahi tha na. Mujhe practical world mein kaam kartay buhat saal ho gaye hein, aisay logon ki ragg ragg se waaqif hoon mein."

"Haan to maan to rahi hoon, aap hi theek keh rahay hotay hein hamesha. Mujhe kya pata, mein to aik immature, irrational insaan hoon na."

"Mene aisa nahi bola, Umeed. Baat ko khuamkha ghalat morr mat do!"

"Mein ghalat morr de rahi hoon, Farjaad? Aap ne kaha tha investor se meeting karnay ki zarorat nahi hai, jitnay paisay chahiyein mein de deta hoon. Mene phir bhi kar li . Deserve karti thi mein ke wo mujhe is tarah treat karay. Deserve karti thi mein ke wo mujhe kahay ke 'aurton ki soch hi mehdood hoti hai, business ke liye bhi kitchen se aagay nahi nikalti'. Meri hi ghalti hai Farjaad, ab aap bhi jita dein mujhe ye baat."

Farjaad took in a deep breath and took a step closer to her. He held her by both her shoulders, making her look at him.

"Umeed, mein jita nahi raha. Sirf samjha raha tha, yaar. Mein nahi chahta ke jo jo chotein mene khaayi hein is raastay mein, wo tum bhi khao. Sirf chahta hoon ke tum mere experience se seekho taakay tumhein ye sab face na karna paray."

"Sorry Farjaad, mein aap ki tarah emotionless ho kar har faisla nahi kar sakti. Kabhi kabhar mein apnay dil ki sun bethti hoon. Aap ki tarah hamesha mechanic ho ke dimaagh se nahi soch sakti aik robot ki tarah. Nahi ban sakti mein aap jesi."

Umeed blurted out, but realised what she had done the moment the words left her mouth. It was too late though. Farjaad's hands, which were holding her by the shoulders just a moment back, dropped to his sides as he took a couple of steps back.

His eyes widened in disbelief, hurt flashing through them, which he quickly covered by a stern, empty look. His hand went to the back of his neck, pressing it hard. Closing his eyes, he inhaled a deep, pained breath, muttering "emotionless robot" under his breath. It was loud enough for Umeed to hear though.

"Farjaad, mera wo - "

She tried taking a step towards him, stopping midway when he stretched out his hand, motioning her to stop. The look her gave her pierced her heart. The eyes that always screamed comfort, the eyes which always grew soft on seeing her, were empty today. There was visible pain in them and to know that she was the reason behind her made Umeed want to collapse to the floor.

Farjaad took quick strides towards the bathroom, his shoulder brushing against her hard as he crossed her, making Umeed stumble slightly. She dropped herself on the bed, throwing her head in her hands.

A few minutes later Farjaad came out of the bathroom, changed into his night suit. Umeed stood up as soon as she saw him, but he again walked past her towards his side of the bed, turning his back towards her.

"Farjaad meri baat to sunein."

"Umeed mujhe buhat need aa rahi hai, please lights off kar dena free ho kar."

Umeed let out a sigh as she dropped herself back on the bed, periodically turning to look at Farjaad's tensed back. He wasn't sleeping either. He eyes kept staring at nothing in particular, just two words roaming around in his mind.