"Cell number 46; yep she's still locked in here. A cop said banging on my door, yes we have her in a strait jacket Batman, she won't be getting out anytime soon."
"He couldn't bother to show up this time, typical." I said look through the glass slit at the top of my door
"Shut up. Scum like you make me sick." said the cop
whatever. Cops don't bother me, the voices in your heads that's what kills ya. My name is Harleen Quinzel. I am a patient at arkham asylum. I'm the joker's girlfriend if you hadn't heard of me. God this straight jacket is totally giving me a rash.
"NURSE, ITS TIME FOR MY SPONGE BATH!"
A bunch of inmate hooted and hollered at me to shut up. What the rest of these loons don't know is my puddin is coming and breaking me out. Any day now he'll be here. He's probably stuck in traffic. Since I'm here I might as well ponder my life.
"Hey stop the racket or it's the chair for you clown." said a ugly nurse
I can't believe I was even one of them. Yes, I the clown princess of crime was an employee at arkham asylum. It all started at my old house.
"Oh lord my hair is a mess." I said getting out of my stuffed animal invested bed
"Crap I'm late. Great job Harleen ya gonna get fired on your first day on the job."
I didn't have time to shower so I sprayed a butt load of perfume on. I put my dirty blonde hair in a messy bun; put my glasses around my brown eyes. I wore a red long sleeved button up shirt with a black skirt. Boy was I a mess.
My boss is Joan Leland. I applied to be one of the doctors at Arkham asylum. I would be working one on one with patients and helping them regain their sanity. On the plus side I can into the heads of some of the worlds master criminals.
Walking into Arkham was like walking into a nightmare. It always looks gray. You can hear screams from inside. It was like a haunted house. It gave me this safe feeling though. It was like I belonged here, Like it was fate or destiny.
"Okay let's just see how this goes."
"Hello I'm Dr.Leland. You must be Dr.Quinzel. It's nice to meet you."
"Please call me Harley everyone does. "I said as I shook her hand."
"So Harley, I must warn you the patients here will not give you an easy time. They eat doctors like you for breakfast and spit you out before lunch.'' Dr.Leland said with a stern voice
''I'm okay with that. I've always liked the glamour aspect of the craziness going on in this asylum. I've always felt drawn to the stories of how they came to be and how they got here.''
''Well Harley I guess you'll like it here because this place is a story itself. I'm sad to say that your offer to treat the villainous criminals of this asylum has been declined.'' She said as we walked through the dangerous halls of the asylum
''I don't understand. I'm qualified and I have methods on how to treat them, how to help. Criminals like two face, Scarecrow, and the Joker need to be treated-'' Joan cut me off before I could finish
''I'm glad your eager but these animals are being taken care by the proper authorities. Come along now Harley I have a patient who you can help and use your various methods on.''
What was she thinking these people needed help. Two face's double personality problem can be easily treated with role playing. Scarecrow can be taken care of with some good one on one conversation. The Joker, well the Joker was one I couldn't figure out he was batshit crazy. I mean there are no patterns I've seen in what he's done. Just a couple weeks ago he snuck inside of an orphanage and poisoned all there food. When the children were all taken to the hospital they all died laughing with a huge grin remaining on their face. The Joker has no true identity. No one knows who he is not even Batman. I had to meet hm. I need to see the Joker face to face in order to dig deeper in his brain.
''Harley this is your first patient. I would like you to meet Thomas Elliot.'' Joan said
Thomas was strapped to one of those old timey asylum beds with a straight jacket on. His face was covered in gauzes. The gauzes had splatters of blood on it. All I could make out from his face was part of his eye that peeped through a little hole.
''Thomas here cut off his own face, Walked into a hospital, and demanded that the nurse give him some skin to make a new face. He had a gun with him so the nurse couldn't refuse. Thank god the cops showed up just in time to stop him from causing any real damage.'' Dr. Leland said
''Am I just going to be looking after him until his face gets better?'' I said with snarkiness in my voice
''As a matter of fact Harley, that is exactly what you are going to do.'' Joan said than walked away
I have to see the Joker. I ran out of the intensive care section of the asylum and into the north wing where all the famous criminals go. It felt darker in the north wing then it did any other place of the asylum. I walked down the halls. I got hoot and hollers from the men in their cells. They acted like they've never seen a woman before. I read the top of everyone's cell to find the right one. First I saw Waylon Jones (aka Killer Croc) his cell was the biggest. No matter how big it was it looked like it couldn't hold a monster of that size. Then I saw Poison Ivy's cell. From the glass window all you can see is flowers. After a while I thought I would never find the Jokers cell, but then I struck gold.
''Nurse is it time for m sponge bath already?'' said a heart stopttingly sharp voice
The comment was then followed by a laugh.
''Hey you're not Darla. My goons couldn't have killed her that fast. What are you doing here and better question who are you.''
I was shocked by the sight of his face. I honestly wasn't prepared to see him. He looked like a clown but more frightening, as if clowns couldn't get scarier. He had bright red lips, hair than was greener than grass on a fresh spring day, and his face was white. His eyes were blacked and looked right into your soul. He was wearing an orange jumpsuit with shackles connected to the floor.
''I'm Dr. Harleen Quinzel. I'm your new therapist. I'm here to get you on the path of redemption.'' I said trying to seem confident
''Harleen Quinzel'', he said to himself,'' twist it around a bit and you've got Harlequin. Why that's a name that puts a smile on my face.'' He said laughing
His laugh filled the whole asylum. You can hear it all through the halls.
'' I've heard that joke before. Maybe you should work on your material when you're down here. I'll see you tomorrow morning.'' I said sternly
''Can't wait. I'll put it on my calendar.'' he said with a villainous smile
