Telling him the truth (Jalex)

Telling him the truth

Alex's POV:
I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. My phone was in my hand, my thumb hovering over Jack's number. My heart was beating so fast that it was almost a hum. "Calm down" I told myself for the 30th time in the last hour. How the hell am I going to do this? How the hell can I tell my best friend in the whole world that 1) I'm gay and 2) I'm in love with him and have been since we were like 14. I feel like Jack might have a clue about the first one, I mean we have spent almost everyday together for the last 5 years or so.
I took one last deep breath and tapped the call button.
It rang three time before he answered. "Hey lex" he said and his sunny happy voice made me momentarily forget why I was freaking out. Sadly I remembered and the panic returned. "Hey Jay" I said, trying to keep my voice steady. Jack could see through me like glass, so he could tell there was something wrong. "Lex? What's up?! Are you okay?!" He asked his voice rising slightly. I smiled to myself, he really was the best friend anyone could ask for, was I really going to risk loosing this?
Yes. He had to know.
"C-can you come over?" I asked, trying and failing to keep my voice steady. "I'll be over in less than 10 minutes" he said and I smiled, he was such a nice guy, he would always drop whatever it was he was doing to help me, no matter how small my problems were. "B-bye Jay" I said. "Bye Lex" he said and I hung up. I threw my phone to the other side of my bed and tried to prepare myself for what I was about to do.

Jack's POV:
Alex hung up and I quickly stuffed my phone in my pocket and grabbed my keys and ran down the stairs and out the front door. I flung the car door open and closed it behind me in almost the same second. I stuffed the keys in the ignition and stomped my foot down. I was unbelievably happy that I was now 18 and could drive; I could get to Alex's in no time at all. I drove as quickly as I could, my brain buzzing with thoughts of anything that could make Alex seen this upset. Was he hurt? What was wrong? Why was his voice so shaky? I couldn't bare to think about how his voice shook with so much worry, it physically hurt me whenever he was in any kind of pain. The truth is that I'm in love with Alex, my best friend and have been for the last 4 or 5 years. I know how wrong it is because he will never feel the same way, EVER, but he's just so perfect and one of the best people I know that I just couldn't help falling in love with him.

I was so distracted by my thoughts that I missed the turning so I had to do a U-turn and go back. I pulled down his street and when I saw his house my heart beat stared to rise and butterflies invaded my stomach. I groaned, this happens every time I see anything that reminds me of him. Or hear his name. Or smell his smell. Or his smile. That fucking gorgeous smile. I parked in his drive way and jogged to the door. I knocked really loudly and didn't stop until I heard his footsteps.

Alex's POV:
I opened the door to reveal a very worried looking Jack with slightly messy hair and rosy cheeks and a small smile spread across his face when he could see that I wasn't hurt. I smiled a weak smile on return and turned around and walked back up the stairs and I heard the door shut and footsteps follow me. I walked into my room and faced away from the door and took calming breaths. I heard the door shut quietly and then the creek when Jack sat down on my bed. "Lex, a-are you okay?" He asked the concern and worry clear in his voice and it made my heart hurt. I turned to look at him and hesitated for a moment, then I walked to my bed and sat in the centre with my legs crossed, our faces about 6 inches apart.
How am I even going to start? Where do I even start?! I know I've been thinking of doing this for about 2 weeks now, but I never actually thought I would. Jack leaned in slightly and put a hand in my knee trying to tell me everything was okay and when I looked into his eyes I could see how worried he was. That gave me mixed feelings. 1) It made me smile, because of how caring he was and how much he cares but it also makes me feel upset because I'm the one causing him to be this worried. "I-I-I'm f-fine" I lied. Okay Alex, you can't go back now, just... Just get it over and done with. Jack still had his hand on my knee and that didn't help me trying to keep my heart rate steady. "J-J-Jack, there's something t-that I've w-wanted to t-tell y-you for... A while n-now and p-p-please don't hate me" I said. I was beginning to shake and Jack pulled me into a hug so my face was in the crook of his neck. I didn't hesitate to wrap my arms around him and I breathed in his familiar smell, trying to calm myself down. "Lex, I could never hate you! Never ever, even if you killed someone I would still love you" he said and I smiled a little.
He kept his arms around me for a good 2 more minutes until I stopped shaking and I kept my arms tightly wrapped around him too. I took one last deep breath an pulled away. Come on Alex, you can do this! I told myself one last time. "O-okay, well, t-there are t-two things I-I wanted t-to t-tell you" I said and looked Jack in the eyes. "Okay, you have my full attention" he said and crossed his legs too. "O-okay... Well t-the first one is that... I-I'm gay" I said and I stared at jacks face for any sign of hatred of anger. But his face just stayed the same, apart from a small smile that was creeping on his lips. "Well, why the hell would I hate you for that Lex? You can't change who you are and there's nothing wrong with you anyway, we all still love you" he said and that made me smile. My shoulders seemed to get a little lighter and I smiled, but I still had the worst part to go. He smiled in return, knowing that I still had something else to confess. "T-t-this one's a little h-harder t-to s-say" I said and took in a few deep breaths trying to keep my breathing as steady as possible. "Jay, I-I... I'm in love with you J-Jack" I said and pulled my legs up to my chest and hid my face.
I couldn't believe I actually said it! Oh my god Alex, you might have fucked up your whole friendship! There was silence for about a minute, but it felt like 2 years. Jack broke the silence. "Lex" he said. I didn't move or say anything, my heart was pounding so loud I could hear it in my ears. "Lex, look at me" he said. I shook my head just enough for him to see. I didn't want to look into his eyes, how could I? I felt a hand on my head and I remained motionless. "Alex, this won't work unless you look at me" Jack said and pulled his hand back. I gave in and lifted my head slightly so he could see my eyes, but I focused on anything other than his eyes. "More Lex" he encouraged with a smooth and soothing voice that helped to calm me down. I pulled my head up and crosse my legs, I knew what was coming.
"Alex, I love you too" he said. Okay... I didn't see that coming. I felt my jaw drop and a smile spread across his face. "You d-do?" I asked. "I'll prove it" he said and leaned in and in the very few seconds I had to register what was happening my heat started beating even faster and my palms became damp and then our lips touched and it felt like heaven. No, better than heaven. I had been waiting for this for so many years and in all those years I couldn't have imagined this moment better. I leaned into the kiss even more and I could feel jacks smile beneath my lips and I was sure he could feel mine. We pulled apart to look at each other and when I looked him in the eyes, my heart sing and butterflies invaded my stomach. "I love you Lex" he said and he rested his forehead against mine and it felt like electricity when we touched. "I love you too Jay" I said and kissed him again. We leaned into each other and I brought my hand up to run my fingers through his hair. He opened his mouth and our tongues traces each other and he tasted better than everything. Better than pancakes, better than waffles, better than coffee, better than energy drink, better than chocolate. We had both been waiting for this moment for about 5 years.
We pulled away because we both needed air and we fell back against my bed and I put my head on his chest and he put his arm around my shoulders. We lay there is silence for a while, I was listening to his heart beat gradually slow down and his breathing become steady, and I loved every single second of it.
"Hey Lex?" Jack asked. I moved my head so I was looking up and him. "Mmhmm" I said. "I now owe Rian $10" he said. "Why?" I asked, curious. "Because like 2 years ago, he said that you liked me and I was like 'no way' so we made a bet, and you have no idea how happy I am that he won" Jack said. I smiled a from ear to ear. "I am too" I said and I really really was.