Covered by Rose Petals (Mile x Apo) [Mile x Apo]

Missing You

The atmosphere that surrounded him in Japan was serene as well as mystifying with its splendor and tranquility. He honestly needed more time to grasp all of the aesthetic as he would consider himself a connoisseur of patience and the art of appreciation. His track record with the collection of guitars that littered the walls of his music room, his outfits that were comfortably vintage and chic, and the company that he kept at his side. Japan offered an abundance and sadly, his time was limited. It was an absolute blessing to inhale the perfume of multitude flora and greenery, enriching himself with the cuisine that he salivated researching about when he planned this trip, and of course, the ability to spend quality time with the woman who supported every nuance and endeavor he embarked in.

What more could he even compare it to?

Life was all about experiences, companionship, and the memories that he would be able to recollect on with pride. It fleeted in an instant, a blink and it was over, so being able to covet this part of himself in a treasure box to revel in when he was older had always been his ambitions. His catalogue via pictures, souvenirs, samplings; all of it wrapped itself in a bundle of memoirs that he hoped to write about one day. Would it even be read?

It didn't matter. He knew that at least one person, outside of his family, would be willing to read it and play a starring role in his autobiography. His partner in crime, the keeper of his heart, and the key to his lock – Apo. Mile's lips upturned into a smile at imagining his lover beside him, bouncing, and flitting about as a curious bee while he, himself, looked over the small trinkets in the marketplace. The shadowed presence never left his side, his mother teased him initially that it was the essence of a connection so profound that even spiritually, they were never truly separated. He definitely enjoyed believing this to be true. A shake of his head to refocus on the task at hand, he picked up items, set down, before returning to it later on as if unable to leave it behind. His heart racing with anticipation at Apo's reaction to them.

They were not a tangible couple that needed to gift one another anything other than each other's attention or devotion; but Mile honestly couldn't help himself. Any little thing was a reminder of the devilish kitten he had left behind in Bangkok. Japan was known for its 'kawaii' aspect that milked consumers like him dry with the urge to purchase everything in sight. A small sigh escaped his lips as he pressed a few Yen to the smiling vendor that was wrapping up yet another thing to squeeze into his luggage. Everything was too tempting. Little cat decorations that reminded him of Apo. Shirts colored yellow or speckled with sunflowers reminded him of Apo. It had gotten bad to the point that even the urge to photograph any lingering street feline that purred at him for a scrap of sushi he had been devouring reminded him of Apo. And he knew anyone checking his phone would find a gallery of strays in his photo bank and only a couple of him and his mother.

When had he become so smitten by someone? The answer was obviously never. Granted, all of his relationships received his entire being – effort at 110 percent – he supposed he didn't expect it to be reciprocated in kind. If he were to calculate mathematically, the most he had ever gotten from his partners was 75 percent. His expectations and standards are high, and his family always told him that there was no one in the world like Mile Phakphum Romsaithong; therefore, settling for 75 would have to do.

Not Apo.

The man not only gave him 110; his boyfriend gave him 120. The competitive little minx. Apo didn't know that Mile held him in the highest regards to consider it a competition, it was just obvious to anyone who spent time with them. As time passed them, it became harder to hide behind the built façade of 'just friends' or 'he is my respected co-worker' and they understood that they would just take fleeting moments as they came. A comfortable impasse.