Ek Nayaa Aaghaaz - A sequel to Yakeen ka safar

Chapter 10

Neelum Valley

Everyone in the house was up and it was only 5:30am. The Khan family was going to Islamabad today. Since the Valima was going to take place in Islamabad, some preparations had to be taken care of there. Asfandyar also had a few outfits that he was yet to finalise. He had been so busy in wrapping up hospital work that he didn't really get a chance to finalise his outfits for some of the functions. Most importantly, Asfandyar wanted to visit Daniyal bhai's grave before he headed to Karachi for the wedding. Daniyal was Asfi's biggest inspiration and naturally, he missed his brother a little more than usual during the days preceding the wedding.

Throughout the journey to Islamabad, Gaiti, Lubna, Usman and Saim excitedly discussed the upcoming event, but Asfand was lost in the memories from his life in Islamabad. Some of those were fond and precious memories, while others, not so much. He thought about their childhood when him, Daniyal, Gaiti and Fariyal would spend the summers together and then he thought of the times when he was a medical student and Daniyal would remind him from time to time that he had to work hard and give full attention to his studies and make their family proud.

He definitely missed his brother and the mentorship and guidance that he had provided, but he also missed someone else. He remembered the care-free, happy-go-lucky person that he used to be. I somewhat miss who I used to be, he thought. Though being responsible, disciplined and professional were great qualities, a part of him wished he hadnt been forced to ingrain these qualities in himself, by the circumstances - his brothers sudden death.

When Asfand went to the US, he carried a lot of guilt for not being able to find out the truth about his brothers mysterious death and give him the justice he deserved. He also felt this sudden pressure to prove his worth to his father and become the son to him, that Daniyal once was. All of these sudden changes made him excessively, professional, responsible and disciplined, almost overnight.

Over the last 6 years, he almost never allowed himself to process those intense, negative, almost traumatic emotions that had hit him. His post-grad in surgery and his duties as a medical professional had become his whole life. He had only a handful of friends who he had superficial conversations with. After the break-up with Faryal, he never allowed himself to really get attached to anyone, so a romantic relationship was out of question. Over-all, his perspective towards life had become bitter. He had locked up the happy, care-free version of himself somewhere, and thrown the keys away. One thing that had remained constant though, was his zeal and passion for helping others. It was ironic, that though he never held space for his own emotional healing, he helped so many people heal from their physical ailments. Over the years, that was the one thing that had made him happy.

Just when Asfandyar was reflecting on his life so far, he thought of the woman he was going to surprise today, his to-be wife, his Zubia. He had to admit that he was unimpressed with her lack of experience initially, however, he always appreciated and respected her hunger to learn and refine her skills. When he looked back today, he realised that she carried empathy for others on her sleeve and she did it so very gracefully. This trait of hers angered him in the initial days, probably because his trauma from the past wouldn't allow him to be empathetic to others so openly. Maybe a part of him was jealous of how she carried her human-ness with such ease, he thought to himself.

As he spent more time with her outside of the hospital, he started to figure out that she was fighting her own demons, her own battles. He didn't know what they were, but he always had a hunch that there was something more that her parents death, that she was grieving or battling. He remembered wanting to ask her on multiple occasions, but dropping the idea because they didn't share such an informal or rather intimate equation back then. While thinking, he realised that her selflessness both, irritated and inspired him at the same time. Irritated, because she did so many things for others, even if she had to out of her way to do them, but neglected herself almost completely. She was a woman who had been through so much emotional and physical abuse, but her world-view wasn't negative or bitter, infact, she was trying in her own small way to make the world slightly less bitter! "Kitni khoobsurat soch hai, bilkul Daniyal bhai jaisi!" He smiled as he thought about how it was her who subconsciously inspired him look at the world differently, more hopefully perhaps and reconnect with the old, happy-go-lucky, carefree Asfi, who he had locked away somewhere.

Just then he realised that they had reached their destination, their house in Islamabad!

Hello lovely readers! I am back with an update after a long gap, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! So far, I had talked about Zubia's emotions and her journey quite a lot, but hadnt talked much about Asfand's. This chapter is dedicated to that! Also, I would urge the silent readers to please vote if you like my work and leave feedback in the comments! It inspires me to write more!

Thanks!