Self Medicate

Chapter 2

Tw: drugs, self harm, arguing, disordered eating.
Chapter 2:

When Mammon woke up he was surprised to find all the cuts he had made yesterday was still there. He's use to having all his wounds regenerate in a matter of minutes, so for these cuts to still be there overnight made him feel strangely relieved.

That soon went away as he realized that his brothers may ask him about it. He was now quite grateful that the uniforms were long sleeved but concerned about the cut on his palm and the one on his wrist as they were still visible.

As Mammon got off of his bed it hurts to move his hand but it makes him happy.

He went to the bathroom to see the knife that he had used. He felt so foolish

He looks in the mirror, seeing the sad failure.

"They'll never love you"

"You're a waste of space"

"Why don't you just die already?

He ripped the bandage off of his palm and made a perpendicular cut on his palm. He looked at the 'x' he has made.

He took a shower today with his mind clear as he walked out he grabbed the knife and plopped it on his bed. He didn't mean to do that and probably didn't even notice. and as he was heading out to breakfast he had a smile on his face as he reminded himself to be happy even if he didn't truly mean it.

He busted into the dining room

"The Great Mammon has arrived"  Mammon yelled, with a big smile plastered on his face.

"Ughhh I already miss when he was hungover" Asmo whined.

Mammon's smiled dropped for a second as a bunch of thoughts ran through his head.... he gripped at his bandaged palm

"I know ya' love me!"

Mammon sat down and ate breakfast. He was starving. He quickly ate the food in front of him as to not have to speak to his brothers only jumping in to make stupid comments that would avoid concerns being raised.

He had just finished when suddenly he hears:

"Hey Mammon is your hand okay?" Beel said with his usual puppy like concern.

"Damn it Beel" Mammon thought "can ya' try not to care about someone for once?" He had completely forgotten about his palm and suddenly all his siblings were looking at him.

"I'm fine and I have to go." Mammon got up and started to head out

"Mammon you idiot it's too early." Levi said

Just then he remembered what he said to Diavolo.

"I promised Lord Diavolo that I would do something."

He knew his eldest brother, Lucifer wouldn't refuse him to go and complete Diavolos order he looked up at him and seeing Lucifers slight nod of approval, he got up and left.

He walked to school earlier than usual.

----

Mammon doesn't want to be in school. He'd much rather be on the roof, in a casino, dead.

Of course he didn't mean the last thing. Not now at least. Sometimes he feels as though he means nothing he says.

At least Diavolo truly meant what he said as he was now in a new room and no one asked him why he switched but he's guessing it's because everyone already knew. He felt embarrassed and ashamed. "If only I could be like my siblings" he thought while lightly pressing the cut on his hand.