Self Medicate

Chapter 1

Being hungover and hungry doesn't help much. He placed his head down as a useless attempt to relax himself.

"Mammon" his teacher calls out

"What?" He snapped, though he didn't mean for it to come out like that.

"Can you try to be like your siblings and answer this? Correctly?

He heard stifled laughter from the class

He looked up at the board. He actually know the answer but hates the snarky remark that come with the question.

So he chose to put his head back down and pretend that the teacher wasn't talking to him.

"You know that's better than most answers I get from you" he heard the teacher mumble.

Even when sitting in the back he could still hear.

He chucks the pencil and it barely misses the teacher hitting beside him he gets up and walks towards the teacher

"Say that again you piece of-"

  ----

Sometimes Mammon feels as though he doesn't think about the consequences of his actions

If he steals something he could get punished, if he takes out a loan that he knows he won't be able to pay back, he'll probably have to deal with someone who wants their money.

And he tries to fight his teacher for "no apparent reason" he would have to answer for it.

Mammon now stood in the student council room, looking everywhere but the two people in front of him.

"Mammon do you have anything to say for yourself"  Diavolo said calmly but clearly annoyed.

"I never liked that class."

"Mammon just because you dislike the class does not give you the right to try and fight your teacher" said Lucifer, trying his hardest to not slap his brother right then.

"Maybe he shouldn't had said nothing "

"Look Mammon you seem stressed, if you truly hate the class that much we can get you placed in a different one, but I expect you to apologize" Diavolo said.

"I'm not apologizing." He watched Diavolo and Lucifer grow more inpatient at his childish act.

Mammon wanted to be anywhere but in this room

Mammon started walking away. He heard his brother telling him to come back but he kept walking out.

"If it bothers ya' that much you can say sorry for me" then he left.

----

Mammon now sat by himself on a rooftop. It was the best place to be alone with no one to bother you. He goes up here to be alone. After leaving RAD he sat up here and thought about everything. He skipped his last classes and it was now after school. There's some people leaving while others staying for club activities.

Which reminded him that he has a student council meeting today. Which only added to his growing frustration.

He should apologize to Diavolo. Not because he feels bad but he would rather avoid dealing with his older brothers anger for what he did. Lucifer will still be absolutely livid but it may help a small bit if he says sorry before he gets home.

He remembers why he was drinking yesterday. He had broken some stupid vase and while normally he would try to think of some excuse in order to get out of the situation. That time he was just as annoyed with himself as everyone else.

He laid down, recalling the previous day.

"Why couldn't you have just watched where you we're going you idiot" Mammon thought as picked up the pieces of the vase from the floor.

"Why do they keep you around if you keep doing stuff like this?" He was now clutching at the pieces in his hands. It must have been to hard though as they began to bleed, but instead of being annoyed, he was quite calm. Then he decided to go out for drinks.

He then remembers how he has behaved today. Not like his usual self. He doesn't want anyone to worry.

----

He stood in the doorway and watched  everyone get ready for the meeting.

"Lord Diavolo?"

"Oh Mammon I just sent Lucifer out to do something" with his signature grin almost as if he had forgotten their previous exchange

Or as if he was trying his hardest to hide his irritation.

"I'm sorry."

"He should be back soon though?" Diavolo said slightly confused.

"No I'm sorry for leaving while you were talkin' and for getting so upset, I just didn't want to admit you two were right."

"Oh"

Everyone in the room seemed genuinely caught off guard by his apology. Then Leviathan began laughing.

"Are you saying this to avoid Lucifer's punishment. You know that's not gonna work right? You idiot."

Mammon caught himself before he could yell back.

"Can I not be sorry? I admit I was wrong am I not allowed to?"

The room was silent once again.

"I'll apologize to that teacher later but I don't think he wants to see me right now."

"I'll accept your apology." Diavolo said while patting Mammon's back.

Then Mammon sat down and looked around his eyes landing on Lucifer walking into the room towards Diavolo. He has no clue how long he had been there. Secretly hoping he didn't hear the apology, but judging by Lucifers eyes landing on Mammon during whatever Diavolo was saying to him he seriously doubted that.

He stared at his hands for the rest of the meeting.

---

His punishment wasn't nearly as bad as he expected. Sure the lecture was long and being hung upside down was uncomfortable but it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. Guess apology might have helped more than he was expecting.

He sat in his room with a knife in his hands he wanted the feeling he got when the glass was had cut his hands. he wants to feel happy.

Or at least he wants to feel something

"This is so stupid" he thought as he stared down at the knife. "I'm really stupid" he made three cuts: one on his palm, one on his wrist, and one on his upper arm. He had only ment to make one yet the feeling he got drove him to make more.

It hit him what he had just done as he quickly started to wash his wrist and the knife and place bandages on the cuts.

He turns off the lights and crawls into bed. He wasn't going to sleep though. He began to cry and only stopped once he fell asleep.

He forgot dinner again.