The Diary Of Emotions

I just wanted some love.

Even though our story didn't end well it's still the best one I know

Sometimes I spend hours staring at the ceiling at night

wondering if you miss me then other times I wonder why I'm even wondering at all

I say you were right for me

I say you taught me things and nobody ever taught me but if you are really right for me

But above everything you are the only one

would break your heart open to see me hurt in the very same way you hurt me I never wanted to loose

But I still did and it's so stupid to think that I'm inlove with the impossibility of us

I will always love you

Even from the distance, Even from the arms of someone else

But then again how can I love someone else when every night I dream of you

You weren't ready to love but I wasn't ready to be here either

You Left but you never really left my mind and it's so funny to think that along you were my yes but I was only your maybe

And I knew that I loved you when I started making excuses of the way that you hurt me

It hurts to be broken but it hurts more to be inlove with the person who broke you

And some people come into my life to teach me how to let go and you were one of those people

You taught me a lot about love even if you couldn't give to me

It's so funny to think that all the red flags I know from the beginning are the reason it all fell apart in the end

And now I wish I never met you because you're too hard to forget about

And you don't call you don't text nothing and here I am

I'm still thinking about you and all I want is for us to meet again before the first time

And out of all the lies you told me

I love you was my favorite one

And I realised that one of the most toxic things I do is ignore the bad in someone because I love them so deeply

And it hurts to remember everything that happened in the past couple of months

The call the facetime the sweet nonsense you would say

The way we cared for each other

The way we loved each other

Like it was just you and me in this world

Only to be strangers again

You broke the girl who loved you more than she could possibly love anything in this world

I didn't deserve that and I knew it

And I realized I loved you in ways I could never even love myself

And it turns out that most of it was a lie but at least for a short while it was one hell of a beautiful lie

It's weird to realize that one person you once told everything to now has no idea what is happening in your life

And I'm left wondering if you ever talk about missing me to anyone

I don't know what I'm more scared of

To see you again or to never see you again

All I know is that at some point my heart stopped mentioning you and your name didn't make me smile anymore