Barnes. Book II

Cats and Cars

***

You switched twice during the day and finally it was getting too late for either of you to continue steering through the dark roads.

"Motel time!" You sang into Bucky's ear in a high pitched tone.
"Wha?" He groaned opening his eyes and sitting up.
"Wake up princess." You unclipped your seatbelt and gave Bucky a nice aggressive push on the shoulder.

He hummed annoyed and shuffled under the belt trying to sit up.
You leaned over him and reached for the buckle, unclipping his belt for him.
"You're welcome my passenger princess, now get up." You urged getting out of the car.

Bucky straightened his back and lazily got out of the car. He raised his arms up, stretching.
After that he opened the back door and peeped in on sleeping Alpine.
"Hey," he whispered scratching behind her ears making her blink "Gotta get up," he chuckled stroking across her back.

You were busy with the stuff in the trunk, trying to find the suitcase with some clothes that you could change into for bed.

"Good girl," Bucky cooed as he watched Alpine get up and yawn before lightly limping over to him and poking her head out of the car to check the surroundings.
"Let's go see mama then." He scooped her up into his arms and made his way over to you.

"Found it," you reached for a rucksack that was shoved far inside, against the back of the car. You shut the trunk and turned over to Bucky, who you'd noticed had been standing behind you for a while.

He had a smile on his face and you realized why when you saw Cat in his arms.
"Hey, Cat, have a good sleep?" You scratched her chin.
"It's Alpine." Bucky corrected.
"Right, Alpine." You chuckled. "Look at you all snug in his arms ey?" You scratched under her chin "Mr.Barnes sure is comfy." You imitated a baby voice, which made Bucky chuckle and shake his head.

Fast forward to you having an argument with the lady at the front desk of the motel.
"WHAT!?" You exclaimed "No cats!?"
"Sorry ma'am those are the rules. No cats."
"Wha-Specifically no cats or no animals?"
"No cats."
Your mouth fell open.

"They scratch the furniture." She said it like it was obvious.
"She won't I swear." You leaned on the desk pleading "She's a good cat!"
"No ma'am." The lady shook her head.
"I'll pay extra! I can't leave her in the car!" You begged.
"No."
"FUCK!" You threw your arms up in the air and walked away, leaving wide-eyed Bucky and Alpine alone with the woman who didn't even look slightly bothered

"Sorry about that, we'll have one room." He forced a dry smile.
"One bed?" She began looking for a key.
"Yeah for two."
"No cats." She pointed at Alpine.
"Yes, yes, I-Uh-We'll figure something out."
"Uhuh," she looked him up and down in a judging manner before reaching for some papers he had to sign before paying.

"No cats? Oh no cats? Well I'll fuck up the room without a fucking cat," you muttered to yourself while kicking a rock around your car.
"That's if I don't sneak her in first." You aggressively whispered to yourself.

"You good?" You heard behind you and turned around.
"Yeah." You said, not convincing anybody.
"I got us a room." He held up a key and a keychain that had a number 13 scratched onto it.
"Lucky number." You commented.
Bucky glanced at the tag and let out a wheeze "Wow, I didn't even notice."

"Hey listen, we can open the window and leave her in the car. We have cat food in the trunk, really it's not a problem, it's just one night."
"In the car!?" You exclaimed.
"Y/N, it's not hot and she won't freeze. Just a small gap so she has some air." He tried to convince you as best as he could.
You looked him up and down, with Cat in his arms. Alpine.

You shook your head and continued kicking the rock around.
"Doll, please!" He jogged after you.
"I'll stay with her. In the car." You mumbled like a moody teenager.
"Y/N." Bucky grabbed you by your shoulder, with his metal arm and didn't even notice.

You looked at it. And then at him.
"Sorry." He quickly let go realizing.
"No-no-no, i-it's fine." You hurried to quickly add. Your mood instantly changed from pissed to concerned. You didn't want him to think that his arm was strange or that it weirded you out. Again. Especially after he had gotten a new one which was an upgrade compared to the last one.

You reached back for his hand, holding it with both hands.
"Ok. Fine." You finally folded, not wanting him to feel bad about what just happened. "One night, we get up early and get back to Ca-Alpine."

Bucky nodded, glancing at his metal palm squeezed between your flesh one's.
"Okay." He swallowed and let out a sigh as soon as you let go of his hand.

The two of you settled Alpine comfortably in the backseat. You put her little bowl of food onto the floor and layered out scrunched up paper in case she made a mess.
The car was parked right next to the stairs that were one door away from your room.
And of course you left a little gap in the window.

"Welcome." Bucky said as he opened the door.
You looked around nodding "Tv right in front of the bed. I like that."
You dropped your bags and went to check the bathroom.
Bucky watched you with hearts in his eyes. His soul had never been happier. You by his side and no one chasing after him, he finally wasn't running from anything.

But within that joy, there was something else. It was uncomfortable and pulling at him from the inside. Whenever he thought of the future with you he felt uneasy. But he couldn't figure it out.

"I'm showering first!" You skipped into the room interrupting his thoughts.
He quickly came back into reality.
"That's not fair." He raised his eyebrows.
You cocked your head out of confusion, stopping in front of him.

"No."
You paused confused.
"You know what we could do?"
You blinked.
"We can just," he shrugged "shower together. So we're both first." His eyes looked around the room like he didn't just say that.
You broke into a series of giggles "Woooow, Mr.Smooth, you got me there."

You opened your mouth to finally say yes, but then something clicked in your brain.
All the scars, bruises, cuts that you had were not appealing. You chewed on the inside of your cheek without giving a reply.
Bucky hadn't seen you fully without any clothes yet after all the fights, and that bothered you.

You cleared your throat.
"Uh or not?" He added, uneasy.
You looked up into his eyes, you could tell he was confused.

You couldn't explain what you were feeling even if you had to. Something between insecure and scared.
You knew Bucky wouldn't dare say anything bad about you, but he could think it and that was worse for you.

You coughed before saying "No, I wanna be first." And then proceeded to smile before hurrying back to the bathroom and locking the door.

Bucky was just left standing in the little of the room, quizzing at what had just happened and if he had done something wrong.

Inside you walked back and forth in small circles with your hands on your head.
"Shit." You sighed. This was so embarrassing.
You couldn't believe you were feeling ashamed with a person who you'd seen hell with.

You turned on the shower and stood in front of the mirror, observing yourself.
You forcefully tore of your shirt and continued staring into the reflection.

You leaned forward, looking at all the bruises on your shoulders. Then you turned with your back to the mirror.
"Jesus." You ran your hand down all the scars.
Your ribs were the worst, slightly jabbing out and also covered in white lines from your surgery.

A sharp breathe echoed through the bathroom as a sick feeling began brewing in your lower stomach.
You sniffled wiping your damp eyes and proceeded with taking a shower after fully undressing.