Zodiac Signs

Signs as Really Bad Puns

Aries: It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

Taurus: My friend's bakery burned down last night, now his business is toast.

Gemini: There once was a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.

Cancer: Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm okay, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

Leo: When the window fell into the incinerator, it was a pane in the ash to retrieve.

Virgo: Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

Libra: I'm glad I know sign language, it's pretty handy.

Scorpio: Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

Sagittarius: The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

Capricorn: I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.

Aquarius: Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.

Pisces: I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.