𝐂𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐄 ! 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐎

fou amoureux (c. sturniolo)

↳ summary: in which chris realizes that breaking up with y/n was never the best way to go about things, but rather the worst decision he's made.

↳ warnings: swearing, verbal fighting, chris having commitment issues.

↳ author's note: title loosely translates to crazy in love in french.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

THIRD PERSON POV

*FLASHBACK*

"chris i cant keep fighting with you like this. we've been together for almost a year and we have yet to even really talk about what we want-" y/n sputtered as she looked at chris, the two of them on opposite sides of the room the simple conversation about the future of their relationship had gotten away from them.

"it's- it's fucking exhausting." she sighed, feeling small as her voice came out hoarse and barely above a whisper. her shoulders slumped in on themselves as chris let out an sharp exhale.

"what do you want from me y/n?"

"i want to know that you see us together for the long run, chris! i want to see you in my future, i want you to see me in yours. i'm tired of tiptoeing around the idea of us lasting-" y/n explained, her voice raising a few octaves as her hurt became apparent, carefully pausing as the next sentence weighed on the tip of her tongue like venom.

"i-, i want to know that you love me." she whispered again, this time turning her back to chris briefly as tears pricked her eyes.

"i'm sorry, but i don't think i can give you what you want right now. i just don't think i'm ready." chris murmured, his chest grew heavy, almost as it had been filled with lead as he watched her nod briskly before walking out the door.

chris fell back against his mattress as he heard the front door shut, begging the tears that stung the back of his eyes to go away, to let him fall into the fit of nothingness that he so desperately wanted to feel.

relationships scared him, deeply, and it was hard for him to build romantic relationships given the way his fanbase acted whenever he came in five feet of a girl. the sheer and utter distaste that his fans felt when he was involved with a girl in any form made it difficult and terrifying to explore the idea of falling in love, so he subconsciously closed himself off.

and it normally worked, the girls that he'd express romantic interest in would get the hint when things seemed to be getting too serious. but he was in deep with y/n, he just didn't want to admit it.

*FLASHBACK ENDS*

you had been a wreck since breaking up with chris. you felt like your world had spun off its axis. nothing seemed right.

whenever your friends asked why you felt so distraught, you chalked it up to growing heavily dependent on chris. explaining that you relied on him for a lot, that he was part of your routine, and that you just needed to learn how to readjust to life without him.

but you knew that wasn't the case. you had fallen deeply in love, for what you considered to be the first real time. so it was hard to let go of what you felt because he was your first love.