JEWEL EYED JUDY

Track Five: The "In" Crowd

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INTERVIEWER: And how was she?

BILLY: One of the most incredible talents I have ever met.

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Vulnerability and vibrancy poured from Judy's voice as she sang, and it was at that moment Billy realised he'd be stupid to let her go. He was starting to think of this as more of a trial-run, an audition, and an overexcited Eddie was shooting eager smiles at anyone who locked eyes with him. From Judy's perspective, Billy looked more like a deer in headlights.

I sound awful, she guessed. Idiot. I'm an idiot.

A reminder of the cash that awaited her was all she dwelled on, and she felt herself relaxing a bit as the time ticked on.

When the final hit of Warren's drum rung out, Judy looked around the room expectedly. Met with an ominous silence, she could only rush to apologise.

"I'm sorry, we can do another take if you want, I'm usually better—,"

"Usually better? You're kidding." Judy winced as Eddie appeared at her side, arm around her shoulders, pulling her in.

Billy we quick to regain composure, "No, no, that was fantastic. Thank you."

Surprised, Judy beamed, "You're sure?"

With a sure nod, "Absolutely."

"Good. If there's anything else you need me for...?"

"Yeah, actually. Could you look at this one?"

"Of course."

Judy snaked her way from Eddie's arm and found herself stood at Billy's side, lyrics in hand.

"Teddy wants...better layered vocals on the album," said Billy, "We were going to get Karen to do it, but I'd like you to try it out, if you're willing."

"Sure," replied Judy, scanning over the lyrics.

Between the song she'd done earlier and the one she was reading now, she was sensing a common theme. My girlfriend this, my girlfriend that. She's the barrier against the sea, crashing down, won't let me burn - or whatever bullshit this time. As a session singer, she was, realistically, in no place to judge, but the hierarchy was getting too much to handle. Down to the instrumentals, they were his. No matter what Warren, Graham, Eddie, or even the seemingly hot-headed Karen wanted to think, those instruments were not their own. Between every hit, every pluck, every key, their puppeteer dangled above, stringing them along as he saw fit. It aggravated Judy to see such a well-meaning group of individuals succumb to what one man wanted, but at risk of losing that money, she decided not to care.

If she took the time to get to know the rest of The Six, maybe she could garner some sympathy for them. But at this moment in time, she was itching for a night out.

She sang again, poured every emotion into her voice. It was cathartic, at times, to sing, and being in the studio was a dream. She knew well enough not to feed into delusions, to convince herself that maybe she was worth something, maybe she could achieve greatness.

Other times, the singing was a harsh reminder of just that. That no matter her talent, she would never be singled out from a crowd, would always blend into the back like the beige person she believed herself to be. It stung, sometimes, when all she'd ever wanted as a child was to be adored.

Away with her thoughts again, she barely registered when the tape clicked.

"Do you think you could give us a minute?" asked Billy.

Startled, Judy replied, "Yeah, sure. I'll... go take a smoke."

She felt the cold, metal handle of the door prickle against her skin as she left the building. Her hands trembled as she pulled out her crumpled packet of cigarettes, pulling a lone one away and putting it to her lips. The flame of the lighter shook gently as she tried, in vain, to get the cigarette lit. Partially filled with anxiety, partially filled with relief that she'd managed to escape the ever-growing tension, she crouched to the floor and let herself breathe.

Breathe in tobacco-filled smoke, sure, but breathe nonetheless.

Time passed by, and before long she'd lost count of the seconds, minutes. A door swung open and revealed an eager-eyed Eddie, beckoning her in.

For once, when she returned, every face revealed that same smile. Aside from onstage and the buzz of it after, she'd assumed the band always looked so miserable together.

"It's not a permanent position, of course," started Billy, "but in future, we'd love to have you in the studio more. Maybe tour with us."

"Tour with you?" echoed Judy. She looked around the room again, and met eyes with Karen. She had a fire sparking in her eyes, one of curiosity but still, determination, "Sure. I mean, yes, of course. I'd love to."

Despite the many crowds of people Judy has performed in front of in the studio, she'd not once stepped foot on stage and sang.

"Just backing vocals. Maybe a duet." said Billy.

"Fine by me." smiled Judy.

Envisioning crowds of screaming fans, Judy felt herself pale - but the excitement was nothing compared to the sickness she felt deep down. She could live through that, but this opportunity? She could never live through not going through with it. She wouldn't have been able to bear herself if she'd said no.

Exchanging polite smiles with Graham and Warren, and then enthusiastic thumbs up with Karen, she felt herself warm up to the people surrounding her, little by little.

"I think that calls for celebration," announced Karen.

"I think I'd have to agree, our wisest Karen Karen!" yelled Warren.

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