TF2 x Reader

💘 Valentine's Day Surprise (TF2 x Reader) 💘

Hello hello everyone! I hope you guys enjoy this VERY, VERY LATE (^^") valentine's day special since everyone deserves to have someone to spend time with! So, why not the whole mercenary team? <3 

Reader will be gender neutral for this one! <3

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"Listen up maggots!! Today is a very special day and we need to show (y/n) just how much we love and appreciate them! Any ideas on how we go about doing this?"

"Well, I suppose I could whip em up a really nice dinner! I remember my folks doing that to surprise each other every year and it always seemed to do the trick! Especially since it was made with love-"

"BOOOOOOOOOO that's lame as hell Engie! We need ta go bigger than just given' them some food. It's Valentine's Day not Thanksgivin."

Engineer felt his cheeks heat up a little bit from embarrassment while he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck and mumbled something along the lines of how you were always cooking for them and that a change of pace would have been a very nice gesture in his opinion. However, Pyro was there to help cheer him up as the large mercenary patted his shoulder for comfort which made the mechanic smile slightly before Soldier nodded his head in agreement with Scout;

"I hate to say it but the scrawny twig is right! We need to be more grand and bold with our affections! Hmmm...OH! We should get our hands on some American made fireworks and BLOW THEM ALL UP IN THE SKY AT ONCE SO THAT IT SPELLS OUT THEIR NAME IN BRILLIANT RED, WHITE, AND BLUE GLORY!!"

"HEY! I AIN'T A TWIG! I'LL HAVE YA KNOW I GOTS MUSCLES TOO-"

While Scout began to argue with Solider, who only got louder to overpower the Bostonian's already boisterous voice, Sniper scratched underneath his chin in deep thought while Heavy crossed his arms over his chest;

"We should all get leetle (y/n) each something special, something that comes from the heart."

"Ah! Vhat a wonderful idea Heavy! I am sure I have some extra baboon hearts in mein lab that I can easily fit a valentine's day card inside of! Und the fun part vill be watching them cut it open to retrieve their gift from inside!"

"...That is NOT what he meant ye sick, twisted bastard. He meant givin' em somethin' NORMAL! Like, uh, flowers or a brand new bottle of Whiskey!" 

Spy had to hold back both an eye roll and a facepalm while he gave everyone in the room a dead stare. These idiots knew NOTHING when it came to romance or showing proper affection for someone, except possibly for Engineer whose suggestion for making you a nice dinner didn't seem like such a bad idea after all now that he thought more about it. The Frenchman held his chin in his gloved hand for a moment before quickly shooting his deep, blue eyes at his fellow mercenaries;

 "Listen to me closely you morons. Since none of you are being any use, I will be doing the majority of the planning and we are going to do exactly what I say. Engineer, find something fancy and savory for (y/n) to dine on this evening. I trust your cooking skills out of everyone else for this. Pyro, you are in charge of the decorating but please for everyone's sake, do NOT make it Ballonicorn themed! This is not a child's birthday party we are planning here. Red, white, and pink roses with some scented candles and velvet drapery will do just fine. Everyone else, find SUITIBLE gifts for (y/n) and I am singling you out the most Medic. And as for you Soldier, there will be NO fireworks so do not even try to go out and buy any. Everyone got it? Once we all have our gifts, it will then be time to make you all look somewhat presentable which will take a miracle but fortunately for you lots, you have me to dress you. Now, déplace-le!"

Aside from Engineer, Heavy, and Pyro, the group of men let out a collective sound of grumbles and drawn out sighs before spreading out to go and prepare, hopefully, the best Valentine's Day that they could for you.