"I'll always wait for you" (Oikawa x Fem!reader) Sequel to "My First Love"

13. Tooru and Y/n

We walked until the sunset made everything darker and we realized that we were farther away from home than when we were at the site of the Interhigh Prelims. We took the bus and sat at the end of it, wanting some privacy. He was looking outside the window and I was looking at him. When he turned his head toward me, I didn't look away. He had no smile. He then pointed to my mouth without touching it.

"Your smile."

I frowned.

"What about my smile?" I asked, then realized how my smile faded since earlier today. Maybe he realized... but I doubted it was only because of that.

"You think I cannot realize?"

I didn't understand and I found myself frowning again.

"You seem to not realize yourself"

His voice was soft, he wasn't reproaching me anything.

"What's wrong, Y/n? I know you're not okay"

Oh... So, that's why. He knew I wasn't okay because of my smile.

"I've been watching you lately. You do not smile as much as before. And when you do, it isn't brightening like it was. You do not- You do not think the smile you're putting on your face. And when you do, it is rarely."

That's when I looked away.

"You know this part of me too well" I whispered.

"Do you remember, last year, what happened?"

"A lot happened last year, Tooru" I looked at him again.

"It's related to my smile" He said, touching his lips. "You said that when I'm smiling to my fans, my smile is not true. Well, maybe not exactly in those words, but you did tell me that when I was smiling to you and Iwa-chan, it wasn't the same when I was talking to my fans."

I chuckled.

"Yeah..."

"So, that's why. The smile you gave us at the beginning of the year, last year, and the smile you gave us at the end of it is not the same. And right now, your smiles are more like the ones you gave us when you were depressive of your parents' death. So I presume it could be related to that, your attitude."

I didn't say anything.

"So, now, Y/n, what's wrong?"

I took a deep breath.

"I'm reliving everything that happened last year... but in my head. I'm realizing all that happened last year and I'm comparing it to the wonderful and heavenly life I'm living right now and I realize how it could have ended there. I almost died, I almost stopped playing my sport, I lost my parents, my brother almost died."

"And do you know what brought this?"

"A good day and a bad day, one after the other. A day I thought was unreal, for its beauty and the joy it brought me and the next one, was a nightmare. It started with the boy who ruined everything that was going good for me. You know, when you think of someone as a friend, and you think he thinks of you as a friend, too, then you don't think all's gonna go bad. You think it will stay the heaven it became just a while ago. Well, it triggered that. It reminded me that I wasn't done with the hell I have been going through all last year. It's ruining me, again, Tooru. I'm scared."

He passed an arm over my shoulders and the other was placed on my face to look at him.

"Look me in the eyes, Y/n" he whispered with a gentle voice. "I'm here. You don't have to be scared of anything, because I'll always be there. I was there last year, so you can count on me this year. You know this. If you come to knock on my door at 4 am, I'll be there. If you call me in the middle of the night, I'll answer. If you text me when we're in class and you're not well, I'll run out of the classroom and find you. I'll comfort you, so tell me everything. You know I'm here."