𓈊 A Poppy By Any Other Name

ACT XLIII

Mr. Harding sighed. "Good God."

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Another week later, Jimmy invited Scott over to his house for a sleepover, though not before going to Scott's favourite diner.

"I'm being adopted by Ms. Gold and Mr. Harding," Scott said as he set his fork down.

Jimmy looked up from his plate. "That's good," he said. "Now you'll have somewhere to actually live."

Scott nodded. "Yeah..." He sighed and took a sip of his milkshake. "But they said they're going to sign me up for therapy as soon as they have legal rights over me." He grimaced at the idea. "I don't need therapy."

"I don't know, I think everybody needs therapy," Jimmy shrugged. "I mean, it's nice to have someone to talk to, right?"

Scott tossed a chip at Jimmy. "Dork," he teased.

"I'm just saying!" Jimmy picked the chip off the table and tossed it back at Scott. "Therapy is a good thing, and with what you've been through, I think you probably do need it."

"Shut up," Scott grumbled. He looked down at his sandwich, the meal cold and untouched. "Jesus, I'm not even hungry enough for this."

Jimmy frowned. "But you haven't had a single bite of it yet," he said.

Scott shrugged. "I probably had too much of this milkshake."

"But... you just had your first sip of it..."

"Okay?" Scott rolled his eyes. "I'm not fat, maybe a sip is too much."

Jimmy's posture straightened, his eyes widening slightly in shock at his friend's sudden change of mood. "I didn't say you were fat," he said calmly. "Have... have you eaten anything at all today?"

"What does it matter?"

"Scott, you're going to get sick-"

"Maybe I want to!" Scott shouted, slamming his hands down onto the table and standing up. His volume gained the attention of everyone in the restaurant. "Maybe I'm trying to starve myself, maybe I don't want to be here anymore!"

Jimmy's eyebrows furrowed in concern. "Where is this coming from?" he asked quietly.

Scott let out a huff and stepped out of the booth. "Just leave me alone," he grumbled.

Jimmy stood up, reaching for Scott's hand. "Wait, Scott-" The latter whirled around, glaring at Jimmy. "What's going on with you?"

"I don't know!" Scott screamed, and everything went silent as Jimmy pulled him into a hug. Scott immediately clung to him, his bandaged fingers twisting tightly in the material of his jumper. "I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me," he cried.

"It's okay," Jimmy said softly. "Do you want to go outside and talk?"

Scott nodded.

"Okay, come on." Jimmy led Scott outside, trying his hardest to ignore the stares from everyone in the diner. "What's going on?"

Scott sniffled, wrapping his arms around himself. "I don't know," he breathed. "I just... what you told me in the hospital helped a lot, but I still feel like- like-" He groaned and kicked a rock into the parking lot. "Like I should've died, too, I guess. I don't know..."

"Scott, you survived for a reason," Jimmy said. "This all happened for some reason or another."

"And what reason is good enough for my sister to kill herself? Huh?" Scott looked up at Jimmy. "Why did she have to die? She never did a damn thing wrong. She was raped and abused her entire life, and she never fought against any of it. She always did what she was told, always listened and obeyed whoever was hurting her. None of it was her fault! She didn't do anything to aggravate anyone; they did it on their own."

Jimmy bit his lip. Maybe he didn't choose the best way to word that...

Scott rubbed his eyes. "She didn't deserve to die."

"And neither do you," Jimmy said instinctively. "You never did anything wrong."

"Except I did," Scott sobbed. "I hurt people, Jimmy. I hurt you. I did a lot bad things when I was with Zach. I-I-" He hiccuped. "I nearly killed someone once because I was too busy trying keep Zach happy." He turned away from Jimmy. "And even though I hate him more than anything, I still miss him and I'm miserable because of it. It's so stupid... I'm fucking pathetic."

Jimmy put his hand on Scott's shoulder. "Don't talk about yourself like that," he scolded gently. "You're not pathetic, you're literally traumatised. It's not really my place to tell you about your own childhood, but there's nothing you can do about being raised to think that the things Zach and your parents did were okay." Scott looked up at him finally. "And you're not stupid or pathetic because you miss somebody you loved, even if you know now that what he did was wrong. Just because you might hate him now doesn't change that you did love him at one point, and it's gonna hurt. But that's okay, because there is not a single thing wrong about hurting. What's not okay is calling yourself stupid because you're upset. That's not fair to yourself. I'd say it's even worse than saying it to another person who's grieving."

Scott let out a whiney sob. "But he hurt me," he cried. "I don't want to miss him."

Jimmy wrapped his arms around Scott. "I know," he whispered, running his fingers through Scott's hair. "Sometimes we can't help missing people. But you're going to get help, and you're going to feel better, I promise. It'll take some time, just be patient."

"I don't want it to hurt anymore," Scott wailed into Jimmy's chest.

"I know..." Jimmy sighed. "Listen, I know you probably don't feel like eating right now," he began, "but I think some food might make you feel better. Dad always says that to me and he's always right."

Scott pulled away just enough to look up at Jimmy. "Can we share a sundae after?" he asked.

Jimmy giggled. "Of course we can."

The smile that formed on Scott's lips was the happiest smile Jimmy ever saw.

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I promise, Scott gets better eventually... Just not in this book /gen/lh

I initially planned for Mr. Harding to propose in the last chapter but I didn't know what to write for this one so yeah. That happened lol

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed, and have a fantastic rest of your day or evening wherever you are! Love you guys <33 /gen/p