Just Survive

Chapter Six

- Ashley Gray -

It's been less than twenty hours since we lost Alice. We lost the girl, that innocent life, in the most tragic yet increasingly common way (since the apocalypse). I failed to save her. My job has always been to save people yet all I do is the opposite - I let everyone down. Alice was such a sweet, youthful and happy child who deserved a life of playfulness and friendships but this new cruel world ripped it from her fate.

It isn't only Alice who had to suffer the pain of the living dead either, but Jamie too who will miss out on a normal childhood, without a friend his age to accompany him. To feel true heartbreak and the loss of a friend so young, I can't imagine the damage.

She couldn't even receive a proper funeral, just a deplorable burial that her parents can never return to because if we don't keep moving on we'll be joining her six feet deep. The soil of a planet that harbours death and disaster is a dark place to be. It took a fair amount of hesitant convincing to eventually get Jack and Juliet to leave their daughter's grave. They understand the dangers that we face in every idle moment and despite the sorrow, they know they have to move on and fight for their daughter who they believe is watching over them.

I've counted the minutes as the group walk or rather stumble along in a lull. The once blue and tinted yellow sky has turned greyscale ever since yesterday. Clouds hover over the forest while shedding light layers of rain that drench our minds with more and more melancholy as the time passes by. Jack hasn't spoken a single word and I can't blame him. His only daughter got bitten by a relentless cannibal and then he had to watch her shoot herself before she became a monster too. Not to mention she used his gun. The shock mixed with a heavy load of grief has to be unbearable. I can't imagine the pain they hold. I can't bear to look at Juliet, I can't bring myself to comfort her like the rest, I hold too much guilt.

I failed them both, I couldn't save their daughter, the person that meant the world to them. I could have run faster, I could have tried harder, I could have killed that damned beast quicker but I let her get bit, let death consume her petite frame. It's all my fault. Not only did I fail Jack and Juliet, but I failed Jamie... he only had one friend in this world and now she's gone.

We stop for a moment to catch our breath and refuel our bodies with protein bars and water. I take a swig from Cody's water bottle, washing down my bite-sized portion of food, before handing the rest of the packet to Jamie. He takes it gratefully, holding his tummy as it churns with hunger.

I rest my hand on his shoulder, taking a deep breath and resting my eyes for a second, allowing the quiet muttering amongst the group to flood my ears.

"You know, It's her fault." I hear, a harsh murmur shining through the mindless chatter. I pry my eyes open and glance around, identifying the voice as they say, "Look how she treats him compared to our baby. She's bad luck."

My eyes glaze over with a sadness that burns straight into my chest. I blamed myself enough for her bad ending, the harsh words are an unnecessary solidification.

"Are you okay?" Jamie asks. His soft voice dries the tears forming in my eyes. I look down to him, nodding before returning to glare at Juliet who glares right back at me.

"It's your fault," She says, calm and collected despite the tears overflowing her bloodshot eyes. Her face glows a gloomy red and her features droop beyond recognition. I don't want to confront a grieving mother, but she needs to keep her opinions to herself, just this once.

"It's always your fault," She continues.

"Juliet, you can't blame Ash for something the dead did." Alex coos, comforting her by placing a hand on her back. Juliet pulls away from his touch and barges over towards me. I don't move.