Dancing The Pain Away

Chapter 4

I woke up. By myself. Josh didn't wake me. I got up and he was sitting at the table. His face in his hands. His brown flippy hair was all messy, which means he didn't get any sleep. "J-josh?" I said. I wanted to know what was wrong but I didn't want to get yelled at. He got up looking happy. He ran up to me and grabbed my hands. "Soph!!!! I'm sooo sorry that I yelled at you last night! I feel really bad. I was just concerned!!!" He said. I started to cry when the memory came back to me. I sniffled. " it- it's ok.." I said to him. "Good! I can't imagine losing a friend like you!" He said and pulled me into a hug.

I closed my eyes. Friends. That's all we were. Friends. The word repeated in my mind over and over. Until I looked at my wrist, those white marks. Some how were worse then I thought because the turned into scars. I didn't want josh to see and know I attempted cutting again so I started trying to pull my sleeve down without him noticing. But he noticed. He pulled out of the hug. "What are you doing?" He said while I was still struggling to get my sleeve down. He grabbed my hand. I pulled back he pulled harder, I pulled my hardest but he was the strongest, so he won

He pulled up my sleeve. He saw the cuts. "Soph-" he began. But I cut him off. "It's not what you think." I said trying to think of an excuse. I saw tears coming to Josh's eyes. Was he- was he going to cry? The tears rolled down his face. He sprang up. "Them what is it Sophie?! You gotta stop this!" He says crying. Him crying makes me start crying and tears roll down my face. "I can't stand to see you like this! I don't want you to be hurt!" He says. He sits down and buries his face into his hands. Why is he crying? It can't be like this!

"Josh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do it that bad. I didn't even think it was going to scar! I used my nail!!" I said "just, promise me you won't do it again" he said.

"I promise."