Lady Jones // Anthony Bridgerton

Tulips

Anthony furrowed his brows, confused with her rejection. "Not before I tell you something." She shrugged, as she stood so close their faces were almost touching. She took a deep breath. "I.. I am not who you think I am. I am not biological daughter of Earl and Countess. I am a maid's daughter. I was conceived in rape.. My mother died giving birth to me." She tried her hardest to look him in the eye, but could not. His stare was too intense, she feared she would cry. "Is that what Fiorella knew?" He gently placed a hand under her chin. Lily nodded. "I am so sorry I lied to you. I.. I could not let her tell you. Or anyone. It would ruin your family. It would ruin you." Her voice was shaking, for the first time Anthony had met her. She was truly terrified. For him, it finally made sense. Why she agreed to marry him. Why her family treated her the way they did. Why she fought so hard for the marriage. Why she yearned for love. Finally, everything became clear. Nothing else mattered. She could of have told him she killed a man and Anthony simply would not care. He.. loved her. As much as he tried to deny it, there was no other explanation. He loved her, and he loved her so much nothing else mattered. Her ancestry, her lies, mistakes.. Nothing mattered when he saw how her lip quivered with fear. Only her. She was the only glimmer of hope for him. He could not lose her. "The only thing that could ruin me is for you to walk through that door." Before he knew it, her waist was under his fingertips, and he pulled her closer. "Anthony, I do not think you understand.. I.. If we are to have children, you need to know.."
He pressed a finger to her lips, shaking his head. Lily was bewildered. She did not know what to say. Of all the things she thought he would say, he choose the most comforting words. She was not used to that. "If you are worried about our children, it should be on your behalf. Whatever they inherit from you, I know I will love. It has nothing to do with who your parents are. You are the smartest, most hard working and bloody terrific woman. I can not think of one thing I do not like about you."
Lily felt like her entire being melted into the kiss, as she cupped his cheeks with both her hands. She could not have imagined a more perfect moment. He loved her. And she loved him. He loved her, despite everything. She loved him, in spite everything. They were not perfect, either of them. Their marriage was far from perfect. But, as they stood there, embracing one another, ignoring the curious faces from the windows surrounding them, simply smiling into what was possibly the longest and most passionate kiss they ever shared, none of that mattered. The love they shared was true. It was not perfect, but it was the truest thing they had ever felt. The ease of being together, the peace of sharing who they were with one another.
*****
"Thirty six." Anthony smirked, as his fingers grazed over Lily's naked back. "You have thirty six birth marks."
"Very useful information." Lily nodded, pressing her lips to his. "And not at all a scheme to watch me bare." She added, rolling her eyes. "Are you calling me a swindler?" He playfully tickled her sides, pulling her closer. "Never, never!" Lily squealed, trying to wiggle away. "Marry me." He stopped, taking a hold of her cheeks. She loved when he would cup her face like that, it made her feel completely safe in his arms. "I do not know how my husband would feel about that, my Lord." She rolled her eyes, a smile spreading on her shiny lips. She enjoyed his silly side, something he so rarely showed. "Ah, that man is a shag-bag!" He shook his head, kissing all over her face. Lily let out a laugh, nodding. "Terrible, terrible man.." She winked. "And a selfish lover." She sighed, rubbing her leg against his. "Oh, is that so?" He cocked an eyebrow, his lips travelling to her chest. "I better show you what I can do-"
"Later!" She swiftly stopped him from going any further. It was well past six. She needed to get ready for the day. Anthony hated how punctual she was about the schedule. He adored watching her get ready, walking around bare, as she did. It was worth getting up earlier just to watch her. He could swear one day his heart would stop from all the love he felt.
Lily was glad Violet had invited her to the modiste. As much as she loved spending time with Anthony, she felt like she was neglecting the rest of the family lately. "And for you, Viscountess?" The modiste smiled, turning to Lily. She had just adjusted the hem of Violet's new dress, pinning the edges. "Oh, I do not need anything right now, I am just keeping my mother in law company." She smiled, as she browsed through scraps of fabric on the table. "Mon Dieu! No, no.. A Viscountess can never have too many dresses."
"Exactly!" Violet nodded, pointing her index towards laces. "You need to stop being so modest."
Lily shook her head, picking up a lace scrap. "Maybe gloves. Lace gloves. I have torn one while horse riding last week."
"Three pairs." Violet instructed the modiste. "One in each color of that lace." She explained. "And perhaps some night gowns?"
Lily felt strangely self-confident, nodding. She did not feel weird, although she perhaps should of have. She was so sure of what she had with Anthony, so sure of her own role in her life, for the first time. The modiste left to search for more needles, and Lily helped Violet get off the wooden pedestal. "You know, I had my reservations about your marriage." Violet sat down, taking off her gloves. Lily nodded. "But I am really happy Anthony chose you. You are the best possible choice for him."
Lily took a hold of her hand, gently squeezing it. She had never gotten a chance to thank Violet for everything. She was the silent ally, Lily knew that. The way she knew when to leave her and Anthony alone, when to push her son, when to stay quiet. Lily could not have gotten a better mother in law. "I admire you, Violet. I can never thank you enough for how good you are towards me."
"I know I was apprehensive. But I finally see my son as he is again, now that he is with you. He is laughing again, Lily. Do you know how long it took him to learn how to laugh again?"
Lily shook her head, biting into her bottom lip. "He never forgot how to be happy, he just needed a little reminder it is not so hard." She whispered. Violet nodded, squeezing her hand ever so lightly. "Thank you for being patient. It is all he needed. Thank you for not giving up on him."
"Violet, I-"
"He lives in constant fear of death. He never talks about it. But since the day Edmund died, it haunts him."
Lily remembered how he was when his uncle died. The fear he tried to hide, the she could never forget how helpless he looked on his knees that morning. The conversation they had about death. What happened in the chapel. The way he could not sleep the entire week after the funeral. Lily was not sure whether Anthony told his mother about what happened between them. She was not sure if Violet knew the truth about her parents. If she did, she never showed. The conversation they had meant the world to Lily. It explained so much. It reassured her. As much as she did not care about other people's opinion about their relationship, Violet's approval meant a lot to her.
*****