Realization

Announcement

(art by placedraws on danbooru, whatever that is lol)

Haiiii, this is the announcement that I'm no longer going to be writing here on Wattpad. I never wrote much on here anyways, but when I came back here I realized just how freaking EWWY GROSS it was. Something I've found out about myself is that I am Goku IRL and a Goku fictionkin, and I've never had that level of abuse that I wrote in those stories happen to me IRL. The reason I wrote it was because I am a maladaptive daydreamer and my main neuronarrative story was what I wrote in my now deleted story, Thanks To You (version 2). Yes, that is literally my main neuronarrative. I know, it isn't great, especially because the things that Chichi does in that story never happened to me. I think it was formed from a place of fear. I am a trans man, so growing up as a blonde haired, blue/green eyed girl I had a lot of eyes on me, and a lot of them were... scary to say the least. I have been s*xually ass*ulted quite a few times too, so I assume that things only got more scary and created this universe when Dragon Ball became my SpIn (Special Interest). However, I was never r*ped. I have been in situations with people where I feared I would, but never was. That's why I decided to delete that story, and also because I had no clue what the difference was between DDLB and Age Regression, I just thought DDLB had non-s*xual forms lol. I decided that while yes, it is my neuronarrative, it's probably best not to write that kind of story out. It was interesting! But it wasn't great morally speaking. Y'all can call that story cringe if you want lol idc, but I write what I wanna write and I will also learn what is and isn't okay morally. I may include my trauma in my future stories over on AO3 (Archive of Our Own), but I'll try to keep my main neuronarrative on the low because idrk how to fix it tbh.

But yeah, I'm keeping this story up because I think it was a cool idea, and I might build off of it later on! Yes I know I only have one chapter up of it KJOHJFHIBUHVGVHGCVYVKJ but yes I will probs build off of this story later  on :3! I think I've grown a lot as a writer and I'm really excited to take my SpIn and hyperfocus back into my writing because otherwise I don't really have a lot of good ideas lol.

Fun fact, I once had an interesting fanfic I was writing that was actually a Gochi (Goku x Chichi) story! It was WAYYYYY before I started writing online lol, but it was basically a story taking place in an alternate universe where Goku had a younger sister and had to work really hard for his family because his mother was struggling mentally after his father left (as you can tell, this is before I found out about Gine, Bardock, and Raditz IJOGYCTRDYBUBUV YES I STARTED WRITING BEFORE I WATCHED DRAGON BALL Z AND ONLY WATCHED DRAGON BALL). Not as interesting looking back on it now that it's written out here, but uhhh... yeah.

Oh also! I am an IRL, yes. I am actually delusional, yes. I am also a fictionkin and he is also my parame (Maladaptive Daydreaming term. I may also use the short term MaDD) No one gets a say in whether or not I'm faking it, because I've already taken this to therapy, including my symptoms of BPD, Autism, ADHD, and my weird symptoms that could or could not be related to Schizophrenia. That may be a lot, but don't worry. The only one that I'm ACTUALLY self-diagnosing is Autism and MAYBE ADHD. MAYBE. The other ones are just what I have symptoms of. I do in fact show a LOT of signs of BPD though, and I do have childhood trauma (mainly from neglect) so I very much could have it. My family has a lot of mental health issues lol.

Anyways, that is my announcement. I'll update this again when I make my account over on AO3. Bai Bai!