Through My Lens

Chapter 22

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"Louis?" a voice breaks Louis from his thoughts. Louis looks up through tear clouded vision making out the blurry figure of Tim standing in front of him. "Louis are you okay?" Tim gasps noticing the tears on the younger lad's face. 

Louis whimpers and shakes his head, whimpering more from the pain. "I am going to get Liam wait right here." Tim hurries out before he races back down the now crowded hallway back to the field where Liam is. 

Louis pulls himself closer into his body. Everything feels numb and yet painful at the same time. Louis is mentally numb while being physically in pain, emotionally he is exhausted. Tired from constantly having to fight the feelings of wanting to give up, tired of feeling like he isn't enough. Tired of walking through life terrified of making the wrong move and getting beaten down even further. Most of all, he is tired of being in pain. 

"Louis!!! Bubs! Are you okay!?" Liam screeches as he drops down onto the floor next to Louis. Louis can't bring himself to move or speak he just feels all eyes on him as Liam inspects his entire body over trying to figure out what is wrong. 

Louis suspects a crowed has gathered at this point, he can't force himself to look up, his eyes fixated on his shoes. He wore his red vans today, he has always loved the color red, a dark deep red to be exact. It's the darkness of it that draws him to it. Or that the color represents all that Louis is not, confidents, powerful, it serves a purpose to draw attention, which Louis tends to avoid. 

"Bubs?" Liam says softly, pulling the younger boy's focus to look up at his brother. "Are you okay?" "I-I" Louis looks up to looks up to meet Liam's eyes, noticing the ground gathering around him Louis lets out a small whimper and freezes. 

"Give him some fucking space and go to the dressing room or you are all benched!" he hears Harry shouting from behind Liam. Harry his Harry, Louis so desperately wants to stand up and run to him, but he can't find the will to move. He is frozen, stuck, nailed to this stupid spot on the floor. The place where Josh put him. 

"Louis, can you hear me bubs?" Liam whispers. Louis goes to open his mouth to tell Liam to take him away from here, to take him home. The only words that escape his lips are "H-Hazzie, I want Hazzie." Louis whines. 

"He's right here bubs right behind me." Liam reassures. "Hazzie... need Hazzie." Louis sobs louder. 

Hearing his name Harry drops everything to be by his boys side. "Hi love, I am right here baby." Harry whispers into the boys temple. Louis breaths in that familiar scent and wants nothing more than to climb into it and allow himself to be drowned by it. 

"H-Hazzie?" Louis whimpers. "Yeah, baby I am here." Harry picks the boy up placing him on his lap. "Want to go home." Louis cries. "We will love, but first I need you to tell me if you are okay? Are you hurt?" 

"Head hurts, back hurts." Louis says so low, Harry may have missed it Louis wasn't literally on his lap. "Want to tell me what happened?" Louis shakes his head vigorously, wanting nothing more than to just leave. He chances a look up and notices that the crowd has dissipated, most likely due to Harry's threat. the boy can be very intimidating when he wants to be. Louis looks over to see Liam sitting beside Harry with a worrisome look on his face, breaking Louis heart. He never wanting Liam to worry about him. 

"Can we inspect the back of your head Lou?" Harry questions timidly almost as if he is afraid that if he speaks too quickly or too loudly it will break the boy in his arms. 

Louis shakes his head again, not wanting anyone to touch his head, the throbbing pain getting worse as the minutes trickle bye. 

"I am afraid he doesn't have a choice; we will need to get him looked and cleared by a medic." Louis hears a voice say from behind them. Louis looks over to see Coach Jones standing there worried. Louis hates doctors and the idea of going to see one right now makes him want to throw up. They are always so invasive asking him hundreds of questions, making him feel small and weak. Like his is a stupid little boy. 

"n-no" Louis whimpers hiding his face in Harry's neck. "Bubs we just need to make sure that you are okay, we don't need to talk about what happened right now." Liam rubs the boys back, knowing how hard it is for him to see the doctors again. 

"We won't leave your side okay love; Li and I will be with you the whole time. Right Li?" Harry reassures the boy sobbing in his arms, gripping his shirt so tight it may tear.  Harry looks to Liam with tears filling the corners of his eyes not knowing how to comfort the boy. 

"Liam you are 18 so I can release him to go with you, why don't I call you two a cab and you take him. But we will need to contact your parents, do you wish to do that, or do you wish me to?" Jones asks Liam, taking out his phone to dial a cab. 

"I'll call my mum when we get to the doctor if that's okay? I want to just give her all the information I have at once." Liam explains to Jones. "Sounds good I will get you two a cab now." He nods.

"Hazzie..." Louis whimpers. "What baby?" "Wh-why c-can't you c-come t-too." he cries gripping the older lad harder as if he was trying to climb inside him to hide away. "Coach I am going with them." Harry explains when he realizes Jones only said the two of them presumably meaning Louis and Liam. 

"Umm okay I suppose that will be fine." He nods and walks off to make the call. 

"Sorry to bug you guys but we assumed you would want this." Niall interrupts passing Liam and Harry their bags. 

"Thanks Ni." Harry smiles. "Can we get you anything else? We overheard you are going to the doctor." Zayn offers. 

"Lou sweetheart, do you need anything? Water maybe?" Harry offers. Louis shakes his head in response. "How about a sweater, can you put your sweater on." Harry urges in effort to keep the shivering boy in his arms warm. 

Louis shakes his head unable to move, the idea of loosening any grip he has on Harry has him in paralyzing fear. He feels Harry let out a sigh and motions for something he assumes from Niall or Zayn. He just allows the four boys around him to talk. 

"Louis, I need you to stand up now, okay?" Harry says pulling the boy away from his chest. Louis does so without protest, not wanting to bring any more attention to himself. He just wants to go home, his home not the hotel, to his room, his safe place away from everyone. To be alone. 

As he stands, he feels a sweater being put over his head and his arms being moved to fit through the sleeves. He is about to whine that he is not a baby and can put on his own damn sweater when he breathes in that familiar scent. Harry. Only now noticing the sweater engulfed his entire body, ending just above his knees and extending past his hands. He rolls the sleeves up giving himself an adorable sweater paw. Harry's team hoodie, red with white lettering and Styles written across the back of the hoodie underneath that number 17. Louis is comforted by the fact that he is wearing Harry's hoodie, it makes him feel close to the older boy as they make their way out to the cab. 

Liam climbs in first, followed by Louis and then lastly Harry. He is squished in between the two boys both pressed close to him comforting him. 

The ride his quiet, neither Liam nor Harry tries to pressure Louis into speaking they just allow themselves to be there, comfort him. Louis can't help but think back to Josh's earlier comments and what had happened to cause him to get so angry at Louis. What it is that he thinks that Louis has done. 

Louis desperately wants to ask Harry and Liam what happened during the game, but to do that he would have to tell them everything and that is not something that he is ready to do yet. Right now, he just wants to forget, to climb into be cuddled by Liam and Harry or to have a relaxing bath.

Harry takes Louis hand in his rubbing his thumb gently across the boys' knuckles, comforting him as they make their way to the hospital.