Chamomile

Chapter 5

1970

"Engaged?" I asked, shocked.

"Yes! Oh Mary, look at the ring it's beautiful!" Camilla squealed, thrusting the rock in my face.

I didn't know what to say, I mumbled a quick congratulations and excused myself to the bathroom, pushing past a customer, and got to the toilet just in time to be sick.

I stared at myself in the mirror, wiping my mouth with a square of toilet paper before flushing it down the loo. I closed the lid and sat on the toilet seat, sweaty face in my clammy palms, and cried. I wasn't even sure what I was crying about, my best friend was engaged, I should be happy for her. Maybe it was because I was nowhere near finding a husband? Maybe I felt like I would loose my friend once she was married? I really wasn't sure, but whatever it was, I finally understood why they called it 'heartbreak', because I could feel the pain in my chest so prominently it really did feel like my heart was broken in two. 

"Are you going to talk to me yet?" Camilla asked, wiping down the counter.

"I'm not not talking to you." I stated, putting the chairs onto the tables.

"But you're not talking to me either."

"Just not in a very chatty mood."

"Scared Louisa will beat you for role of bridesmaid?" She joked.

"Not funny, Camilla."

"I thought you'd at least be a little happy for me."

"I am."

"Yeah that massive frown really shows it."

"What do you want? For me to jump up and down about it? I'm happy for you. Now drop it."

She put down the sponge she'd been using to clean and walked over to me.

"Jealous?" She asked, sitting backwards on one of the chairs I was yet to stack so that she was stranding the back of it facing me.

"Of you getting married first?"

She shook her head.

"Then what?" I asked.

"You tell me Mary."

I rolled my eyes, shewing her off the chair so I could stack it.

"You know I'll always love you more than any man. You're my best friend." She said, stroking my cheek with the back of her fingers.

There was a long pause as we stood looking at each other, her fingers moving from my cheek to my jaw so she was holding my face. She breathed in deeply, smiling and licking the corner of her mouth like she always did when she was nervous.

"Ready to go?" Billy called out, walking through the door and breaking the silence.

I jumped back from Camilla at the sound of his voice and picked up a mop to start cleaning the floor even though I'd already done it.

"I don't know Mary, am I?" She asked, turning her head towards me and raising an eyebrow.

I swallowed nervously. "Yep, sure. I'll lock up."

"Ok then. I'll see you in the morning. Sweet dreams, darling." She smiled at me, linking arms with Billy and walking away.