your song ➳ one shots

s e v e n ✿ terrible things - mayday parade

I nodded absentmindedly at the doctor, half-heartedly taking everything he was saying. It was too painful, and I could never ever handle it. Tears were starting to well up in my eyes, but I tried so hard not to break down in front of the doctor, so the moment he left, I grew weak in the knees, and cried.

They say, it is so hard to give up anything that is so dear to you, and probably, this is the most difficult thing to give up - him. It's been years since that day he told me everything, but we stayed strong, we went through it all, and it just saddens me that it all has come to an end.

I'm not ready to let go.

I will never be ready to let go.

I glanced at him through the glass that separates our area from him. It makes my stomach churn to see how many apparatus are attached to him, keeping him alive. But seeing him fighting for me, for Crystal, I know it is not right to keep him struggling.

That's when I wiped all the tears from my face, and wore the prescribed clothes. It's been 4 months since he got sent to the hospital and was advised to stay in the intensive care unit for monitoring.

However, every second that passes by, the truth of him leaving us dawns into me, and tears slowly begin to make its way through my face again, and I know he wouldn't want it, so I spent a couple more minutes by the door and took a couple of deep breaths, and finally, went in.

He was soundly sleeping when I went in, so it was quiet, with only the sound of the constant beeping of whatever machine making a constant rhythm. Crystal's watching her dad intently. I had to swallow that lump in my throat when she looked at me, knowing she'll ask when her dad is supposed to come home with us. I usually answered with 'soon, baby, dad will be with us in our little home, soon.' But now, I silently prayed, she wouldn't ask anything, because if she's going to ask that innocent question, I might break down again.

"Dad," I heard her call him.

It sounded so good, so innocent, how do I even let you go? How am I supposed to let you go? How am I supposed to tell Crystal that you're going to say goodbye, Michael, how?

Minutes later, Michael started stirring from his sleep. I checked the clock, 7:59pm. So while Crystal was attending to her dad, I adjusted the blinds, so I could see the city line, the night sky, and the stars.

"You do know I do love seeing the stars, like the way we used to watch them, back then," I heard him chuckle. And I swear, my heart was breaking into a million pieces, knowing these are the last moments I'll hear that chuckle, and see his nose crinkling with his laughs.

"Oh my God, Dad, please tell me how you and mom met, pretty please, dad, dad, please," Crystal jumped on his bed, and pleaded. How I wish I could freeze this moment and we just stay like this.

"Crystal, you don't jump on your dad's bed, dad needs rest," I reminded her.

"It's okay, bub, you could sit on dad's tummy, if you want to," he said.

I discreetly took a photo of the cute scene. I know I was violating the rules, but, for one last time, I need to have a remembrance of how everything seemed perfect, of how everything seemed normal, for once, even just for once.

"So, Dad, how did you meet mom? Pretty please tell me the story. I really wanna know why you said 'just like before' a while ago," Crystal asked her dad once more, while she positioned herself on Michael's stomach comfortably.

"Well, it started on that weekend we were asked to go to the library..."

[7 years ago]