QUEEN [EXPLICIT;QUEER;UNORTHODOX]

Chapter [1]

I believed my dude could tell what was up, and many of our friends could too. "Yall act like yall in love or something."

In my entire 30 years of life I have only been "in" love twice. One of those times includes my daughter. The other time is for another chapter.

Even back then I knew I wasn't "in" love. I got clowned about it, but I really wasn't.

Whatever it was that I felt stayed in the air, and I made sure of it quite harshly.

There were several times I ignored her and would dissociate myself out of giving her any energy.

I stayed hot and cold with her, but the moments I was somewhere in between seemed to be what kept her hoping for something I honestly couldn't give her then.

I was supposed to be heavy with ol' dude and I could barely give him that -- so what made her any different?

She stayed dropping subtle hints. More than before.

As much as I seemed to not give her "hints" the time of the day -- I was paying attention. I was just skilled in looking oblivious toward what was trying to get my attention.

I would hang out with her, and go home and fuck ol' dude because I couldn't get to her the way I wanted.

I should have left the relationship -- les be honest..

I realized how bad it had gotten when I went to stay over on a night that our little group wanted to do a movie night.

We watched movies, and drank. I had a couple while she polished off several.

The night cut to a close around 2am, and I was very aroused.

Throughout the time she had slowly removed her bra, and leggings. She only wore a big t-shirt. I wasn't sure how my act of being oblivious was going, but our mutual friend raised her eyebrows at me when I got caught watching her.

Most knew I wasn't exactly hetero. I flipped back and forth with ease between masculine and feminine energy. Dependent on the person.

She was easily submissive though.

Everybody was asleep just about. Every-time prior that I'd slept over it would be in her bed with her. Strictly platonic.

Once there she pulled me close playing in my fro. She loved my hair when it was just out. I told her it felt nice.

This was the norm for us.

I wrapped an arm around her, and she actually fell asleep shortly after, but I was fully awake.

My ego kept telling me to just do it. The door was already shut to her bedroom. I could cover her mouth and put in some work.

No one would hear us. She could be quiet.

I looked over at her sleeping face. Nah. I couldn't. I wasn't going to either.

The passion I truly wanted to pour into a few hour situation would for sure fuck her all the way up emotionally atleast, and I already was dissociating with my own damn feelings.

So, this would only be a recipe for disaster.

I pulled away from her, clamped my thighs around my hands, and forced sleep.

Things got worse though.

I remember telling my dude I craved some pussy. CRAVED. He already knew what it was, and was cool with it as long as he got to watch or join. Which I wanted no parts of him to have.

I wanted to be absolutely selfish. So I absolutely was, and told him that too.

I'm not really one to just grab somebody out of thin air as that has never been me. So, I picked somebody out who I knew, and also knew would be down.