Black Blood Academy: Spade Arden

1st Blood: "Beast"

1ST BLOOD: "BEAST"

"THAT'S right, Spade. Wala silang pakialam sa 'yo. Iniwan ka na nila. Namuhay sila ng matiwasay, ng masaya. At ikaw ang iniwan nila rito para magdusa. H'wag mo na silang isipin. They are not the friends you think they were."

Hindi kahit kailan na naisip ni Spade Arden na sasang-ayon siya sa High Queen na si Avery—o kahit na sino pa sa mga High Queens, for that matter. Pero sa pagkakataong ito at sa mga pagkakataong susunod pa, sang-ayon siya sa sinasabi nito. However painful it was, batid niya sa kanyang sarili na nag-iisa na lamang siya sa labang ito.

Six months ago, that fact finally sunk into him. Ilang buwan siyang naghintay upang iligtas siya ng mga kaibigan niya. Ilang buwan niyang tiniis ang panunuya ng limang High Queens sa kanya, ang mga pasakit, ang bawat latay at peklat na nasa katawan niya na ngayon ay nagsisilbi na lamang paalala ng kanyang kamangmangan sa paniniwalang kakampi niya ang mga traydor na iyon.

They were selfish bastards. They were the enemy, not the colony. And they will pay for everything he endured waiting for them to save him.

"Come to me, pet. I can avenge you. Come to me..."

Suminghap siya't tinakpan ang kanyang tainga, as if the voice can be blocked out by doing that. Ngunit hindi. Ilang beses na niyang sinubukan, ilang beses na niyang pinagtangkaan.

But the voice couldn't be blocked. It won't go away.

Naramdaman niya ang malamig na kamay sa kanyang pisngi, ang pag-aangat ni Avery sa kanyang mukha upang mabasa niya ang bibig nito.

"You're hearing him again, aren't you?"

Tumiim ang kanyang bagang at nag-aalangan na ibinaba ang kanyang mga kamay mula sa kanyang tainga. The grin Avery gave him was self-explanatory. He knew he looked so stupid covering his ears. As if he could even hear anything.

He's deaf, for crying out loud!

"It's okay, Spade. I understand. Now come here, ignore him if you must. But do now what you want to do to forget everything that's plaguing you. I'm here—we are all here to serve purpose to you."

He believed that's High Queen euphemism for 'I want you to fuck me now'. They do have a tendency to use kind words to convince him that anything they commands is for his benefit. Nauunawaan niyang ginagamit lamang siya ng mga High Queen—either it was in bed or out of it. But that was fair enough for him. Dahil ang katotohanan ay ginagamit din lamang naman niya ang mga High Queen upang makaganti sa mga dati niyang kasamahan.

"Come release my dress, Spade. I want you to touch me with your bare warm hands."

And he wanted to touch something warm too instead of a cold as granite body only willing to be touched by him because they wanted his allegiance.

And because they simply has no choice. Same as he didn't have any either.

Hindi niya aaminin ng malakas pero alam niyang kontrolado siya ng mga High Queen. Be it with his body or be it with his mind. They fucked him up so badly. The scars, the damage and the mess in his mind. He was a broken man. Theirs to play and theirs to use as they deem necessary.

And while he could feel Avery's hand on his bare length, squeezing and grasping hard as if to punish him, he remembered the torment he'd endured from the hands of the Colony almost a year ago.

Sa bawat haplos ng High Queen, naaalala niya ang mga araw na inilagi niya sa silid na iyon. Ang bawat paghampas ng latigo, ang sakit ng nagbabagang metal sa kanyang dibdib. Ang mga araw na nanghihina na siya sa gutom, deprived of any food until he speaks up. The nights where it was so hard to fall asleep despite his exhaustion. The nights where he prayed for someone to ease all his pain away.