is this love?

22

"it's okay now. just a misunderstanding." i replied on instinct.

my mom was too tired to care, "whatever. you should get some sleep." and with that she was gone. it was only eleven, but she didn't seem totally awake.

when she left i got up and shut the door behind her. before i could even turn around, matt wrapped his arms around me and kissed me again before pulling away. "i'm jealous too." he admitted, but obviously didn't want to talk about it as he connected his lips with mine again. i had missed this so much. i had missed him so much. his petal soft lips, his warm breath, his vulnerability.

my hands traveled to his hair and lightly tug at his roots. he leans me against the door and deepens the kiss. his mouth opened slightly and i slide my tongue in with his. his mouth is so warm and wet it makes me let out a small noise and matt makes one at the same time. hearing him makes me want him even more. my hands fall to hold his face and i let my thumbs graze his cheeks.

we pull away for air, breathing heavy. his cheeks were red and i could feel mind burning as well.
he rested his forehead against mine and looked into my eyes deeply. "i missed you." he whispered, the corners of his mouth twitching to a frown. his eyes started to get watery and if he blinked, a tear would have fallen. this make me realize that i had watery eyes too.

then he pulled away, "i don't know why i'm crying. guess i'm on my man period or something."

i felt hurt. i thought we were having a moment. i thought this was the part where we confessed our feelings for each other. guess not.

i scoffed and went to lay on my bed.

he sighed ran his hands down his face roughly. i decided to lighten the mood, "you'll cause wrinkles."

he looked at me and i smirked. we both started laughing and he came to lay down next to me.

"so. prom." he said propping himself up on his elbow. i just stared at him for a second. his silky chocolate hair falling around his perfect face. all blue eyes and pink lips. he was so cute and for a second i felt guilty for ever making him feel jealous by kissing chris.

"yeah, prom," i snap out of my trance. i clear my voice, "i already scheduled a photographer. we have an appointment at 4 o'clock before prom." i laugh awkwardly as i had already made all the plans without him.

"cool," he nods, "and the van for transportation i guess." he mentioned.

"or we could rent a limo...... or a carriage with horses!" i joke. well, i was only half joking.

"no! we're taking the van!" he laughs.

"well next year i'm renting a limo." i inform him.

he looks at me with those dreamy eyes before saying, "i won't be here next year."

"you're graduating. you make it sound like you are getting sent away." i roll my eyes.

"you don't sound very sad about me leaving." he comments light-heartedly.

i just push him lightly, smiling.

"will you miss nick and chris?" he asks lazily, his eye lids droopy.

"yes." i answer just as calmly.

"but you won't miss me." he says quietly, with a light grin.

"nope." i respond with the same light grin.

he sighs, rolling on to his back, "i always knew you hated me." he stares at the ceiling. i don't respond and he looks over at me all doe eyed. "i always knew i was your least favorite triplet."

he was making my heart twist and ache as he played this pitiful teasing game. i was too entranced by his sad voice and puppy eyes and the words he was saying to care about the fact he was kidding.

"you're not my least favorite triplet." i whisper back, breaking down and scooting closer to him.

"i'm not?" he holds back a smile.

"of course not." i couldn't take it anymore. i was full simp mode. i take his face in my hands and kiss him all over, not missing a spot. his cheeks, his forehead, his nose, even a quick one on the lips. he giggled and squirmed and i finally stopped. i lay my head down on his shoulder and wrap an arm around him and a leg over his as well. he slightly tensed at the contact at first but quickly relaxed.

"are you spending the night?" i asked hopefully.

"i don't know....." he trailed off. instant regret slapped me in the face. i forgot he kinda is seeing someone right now.

"i'm kidding. of course i'm staying." he said sitting up a little. oh. well screw netty then. i wasn't going to complain though. besides, me and matt are friends. it's completely fine if he stays over. we got all of our making out out of the way, and the rest of the night should be completely platonic.

spoiler alert, it wasn't.

i don't know where me and matt stand right now, but i don't care. all i know is i missed him.