Beauty of My World

Chapter Five

"Do you," Seokjin pauses. "want to talk about it?"

Taehyung lifts his head slightly. "You want to...hear?" he asks, doubtful and almost, timid. He had expected them to go back home and forget the whole ordeal. Yet, it seems that that isn't the case for Seokjin.

"If you're comfortable telling me," Seokjin articulates clemently.

Taehyung inhales shakily. Seokjin would like to hear his concerns. Why? He won't get anything out of it. Should he confide in Seokjin? Taehyung has never really shared his feelings with another. He talks to Hoseok about some of his thoughts but not his emotions. Will any good come from sharing?

He exhales. "Do you want to hear everything?" he asks, meekly.

"I don't need to hear everything," Seokjin reassures him. "Just share with me what you want."

Maybe he can just tell Seokjin some of his problems, and get some stuff off of his chest. Seokjin is a nice person. It wouldn't hurt to confide in him. He must be making Seokjin stressed, not telling him anything, and acting out when Seokjin is to care for him. "I don't like the house," he starts. "I prefer the little house which is more like a shed, to be honest," he continues. "I like it better though because I'm not alone."

'I have you with me,' he thinks but doesn't say.

"I also don't like the house because it reminds me of my alpha father. I feel guilty when I think of him," he bites his lip to keep it from trembling. "How could I not feel guilty when I'm the reason he's not around anymore," Taehyung's voice cracks and he has to pause.

"Taehyung.." Seokjin begins but Taehyung continues.

"I was a bad son," he confesses. "I blamed my alpha father for sending me away. I resented him, my only family left and now he's gone. I promised myself when I was abroad that I'd never return here. However, I couldn't keep that promise because I wanted to see my omega dad again. He loved nature and asked us to turn him into a tree when he passed so," he swallows, feeling a lump in his throat. "We gave him a tree pod burial, turning him into a maple tree."

"I'm sorry, Taehyung," Seokjin apologizes.

"It's fine," Taehyung dismisses him. "You didn't know. I just..couldn't face my omega dad after what I did to my alpha father. He would be disappointed in me. He would hate me-"

"He doesn't hate you," Seokjin interrupts, placing a hand on his arm.

"He does!" Taehyung turns around. "Why wouldn't he? I was driving that night." The familiar wet drops slide down his cheeks. "I disagreed with him and started the fight first. I wasn't a good son. I didn't listen to him. I-I," his bottom lip trembles. "I killed my father."

Taehyung can feel fresh tears wash his other tears away. "What kind of son kills their own father? It makes sense why I'm all alone now with no family. I will always be alone. I have been my whole life so it shouldn't be that different. Yet, this time it hurts because I know that it was solely my fault. I'm even blind too so I can't even see my omega dad. I can't see the world. I can't do anything. I'm just a useless body." Taehyung's breath hitches, "I wish I had just died in that car and taken my father's place-"

Suddenly, Seokjin pulls him into an embrace. "Don't," Seokjin's voice comes out shaky. "Don't wish that. It wasn't your fault," he says, voice still unstable. He presses his face into Taehyung's shoulder, making it wet and that's when Taehyung understands why he sounds the way he does. "Your parents don't blame you."

"Yes, they d-" Taehyung gets cut off before he can finish.

"No, they don't. No one does except you," Seokjin pulls away slightly. "Don't blame yourself anymore, Taehyung." Seokjin presses his head against his chest. Though muffled he says, "I'm glad that you're here."