Her past (RE-WRITE)

Chapter 16 - An unnamed girl

Fight or flight is usually the reaction to a situation in which you feel in danger. 

Then there's the less used word  in this situation starting with f.

Freeze. 

I completely freeze as he violently pushes me against the lockers, trying to touch under my blouse. 

"No, no no." I whimper, but my body can't react to push him away. 

Tears run down my face, and my breathing is erratical, but I can't get him away, I can't even try. 

I can't believe this is happening again, it used to happen every other night, but this isn't John.

Maybe I'm the problem. That seems to be the case considering this is someone else.

Suddenly he's off me, and I don't even take a second to collapse, hugging my knees while sitting on the ground. 

I look up, and I notice a girl is the one that got him off me, she has his arm twisted on his back and is pushing him against the lockers. 

"Leave the girl alone you bastard."

He's clenching his teeth in pain but he pretends is nothing and still answers back. 

"She was asking for it. " Was I? "The little slut won't admit it but she was enjoying herself."

Slut. He's not the first to call me that. Surely it is me. Surely I have something in the way I move or act, speak. 

"Yeah, I noticed by the tears." She presses harder on the arm as she says that, making him groan, "Listen you little fucker. You will run the fuck out of my sight and you will never put a hand on another girl again, not even look at them. Or next time you'll have worse than a broken nose." 

A broken nose, what's she talking about?

Just as I finish my thought she grabs him by the hair and pushes his head against the locker. Hard.

Blood runs down his nose, and he starts crying. 

"If I ever have to deal with you again, I'll break your fingers, one by one, since you clearly don't know where your hands belong." She says to his ear, he nods vigorously, looking afraid. 

She lets go of him and he walks away as soon as he can, I don't see him go, because I bury my head in my knees. 

"Hey." I feel a hand on my shoulder and I flinch. "Sorry, I'll warn you next time." I don't even nod. I actually don't even breath as I feel shaky and in panic.  "If it's okay with you, I can take you somewhere to help calm you down. It works for me at least." I give a very small nod, but apparently she sees it so she nods back.  "Are you comfortable with taking my hand?" I nod again. 

She leads me somewhere as I lean into her the whole way. I don't even notice when suddenly we're on an outdoor garden, with fresh air, but even that doesn't help me breath.

"I can't breath." I say breathlessly and in panic.

I start taking of my tie and coat, messing with my shirt, anything to make my chest feel less constricted. 

"Hey, hey. I'm about to touch you." She says softly but reassuringly, and she grabs my cheeks to make me look into her eyes.  "You're okay. I know it doesn't feel like it, but you can breath. Do it with me. I'll count." She inhales. "One, two, three, four inhale. One two hold. One two three four five exhale." I try to follow, but fail, and keep breathing erratically. "It's okay, It's okay, just keep trying. I'll keep counting." 

And she did, I don't know for how long, but after a while I was only focusing on those numbers, and my breathing had evened out. I noticed we were seating in a bench, my hands on hers.

That's when I start feeling embarrassed. "I'm sorry for being such a mess. I just-"

"Shhhh, it's okay, it's okay. Want a hug?" She offers, and I decide to take it, hugging her. "You're okay, it's okay." 

I feel calm in her arms, warm. But not in the sense I was with Victor, or anyone else I had ever hugged. This is different, this is new, and I kind of love it. 

After a while I completely calm down.

"Hey... I don't know how to bring this up, but earlier during your panic I couldn't help but notice a bruise in your stomach." She says once we separate. I look away, somehow not finding a lie for the first time in a long, long time. "You don't have to tell me. I just need to know, are you safe where you are right now? Do you need help?" 

I look her in the eye, and find myself feeling so grateful not to have to lie with this one.

Because for once, I am safe. 

"I am. I got out of the house I was in." She looks at me and nods. Then starts to look for something in his pockets.

She finds a post-it and a pen. 

"I am glad, and I believe you. But just in case." She looks at something in her phone and scribbles it down. "This are some numbers and places that could be of assistance. And if you are not ready to report." She writes something else down, this time by memory. "This is my number and address. I live with my mom, she's good, I swear, no males in the house, we have an extra room with a working lock, and you can stay as long as you want. No questions asked." She hands me the two post-its.

I smile. " I don't need them."

"I know you don't" She doesn't retract her hand though. I take them, put them in my pocket, and then immediately hug her.

"Thank you so so much. I wish someone had done this for me before." She hugs me back. " But for your peace of mind, I'm safe. Actually, my brothers are in the cafeteria and will probably think I'm lost." 

"Then I guess you should go." 

She nods and smiles a huge, beautiful smile. I give her a good look for the first time. 

She's a beautiful girl. Her skin is white and she seems to have some kind of Asian ancestry by her features, including some gorgeous brown eyes, with a smoke eyed makeup making her look badass, some plump lips, high cheekbones, and a pretty nose. Her hair is pulled back in the neatest ponytail I've seen, looked with gel, and she wears her uniform neatly, but without the coat and with the skirt about an inch higher. 

"What?" She says after I don't stand up a few seconds later. 

"I was just thinking about how breathtakingly beautiful you are." 

It takes me two seconds to realize what came out of my mouth and bring a hand to cover my lips. 

I didn't just say that. 

I didn't. 

Oh my god I did say that. 

Can the earth swallow me right now?

****

So, I was super nervous but also super excited to bring Alexis into the book. 

Last time the character was really inconsistent and messy. 

How did you like her? I really really want to know. 

Question of the chapter: What's your guilty pleasure?