are we still friends? (the summer i turned pretty au)

chapter three

i knocked on the door of the fisher house at 5:30 on the dot. in one hand held a batch of my mother's recipe chocolate chip cookies, and my overnight duffle bag was slung over the other shoulder. i waited for a moment, and was about to knock again when the wooden door behind the storm door opened. through the glass, I saw the face of conrad fisher. his hair was floppier than ever, and it seemed he had grown even taller. i couldn't tell what he was feeling when he saw me behind the door. maybe confused, or sympathetic, or probably just indifferent.

"hi," was all he said when he opened the door. i don't think he had been expecting me.

"hi," i responded, almost questioning him. for the first time with conrad and i, it was almost... awkward? jeremiah appeared at the door of the den, laughing as i struggled to walk through the door with all my belongings. he quickly walked over and grabbed the stuff out of my hands.

"let me take this. geez conrad, are you just gonna let her struggle?" jeremiah teased. conrad just shrugged and wandered back into the den. i followed jeremiah up the front staircase and down the hall towards belly's room.

"jere, seriously, is conrad on drugs? he looks like a zombie," i commented.

"tell me about it. all he does is smoke and drink, every day," jeremiah sighed. we reached the closed door that led to belly's room. jeremiah's was right next to it, across from conrad's room and the bathroom that all the kids shared. before i could knock on belly's door, jeremiah lightly grabbed the crook of my elbow. "anna, could we talk later? after dinner?" he asked, more seriously than he usually is. it's times like this that makes it so difficult to spend time with jeremiah. sometimes trying to find the balance between hoping that he could feel a certain way about me and just wanting to enjoy his company and friendship seemed like an impossible task. i furrowed my eyebrows at him, and he let go of my arm.

"yeah, of course," i responded. i had no idea what he wanted to talk about. knowing jere, probably a new girl he had already met, or one of those video games him and steven were obsessing over.

i opened the door, and was almost taken aback by the time capsule that was belly's room. it looked exactly the same as the last time i had left it, two summers ago. even junior mint, the polar bear stuffed animal that conrad had won for her at the boardwalk, was sitting on her bed. i had been fishing with steven and jere when conrad took her. i thought she should've been over the moon when she told me that it was him that had won it for her, but she seemed more upset than excited. the three of us never found out what happened on the boardwalk. after i set my stuff down in belly's room, we went downstairs to find the boys still in the den. the moms were in the kitchen, making dinner. susannah immediately dropped the food she was making and opened her arms up for a hug. i happily accepted them, getting pulled in for one of the tightest hugs i've ever received. i buried my face in her shoulder. she smelled like clean laundry, mixed with the ocean. we broke apart, and she grasped me by the forearms. I looked down at her, I was officially taller this summer, and noticed that she looked older, more tired. still as beautiful as ever, but not the same.

"anna, you have just grown up overnight. you look more like your mother every day, doesn't she, laure? honey, you've always been beautiful but- well, you're in bloom," susannah had a way of saying things that made you really believe her, like it was the most true and genuine thing she's ever said. i couldn't help the grin the spread across my face. still, i was glad that the boys were in the other room. i knew i looked different, no more braces, no more acne, no more baby fat, new clothes and hairstyle, and i knew that they noticed too. but it still embarrassed me to hear it said out loud. and i knew that the boys would have a field day with it.

i hugged laurel next, quickly and more business-like. just like laurel. susannah always said that belly and i were just like her and laurel. belly wore her heart on her sleeve, always ready to get her own way. i guess that made me laurel. level-headed, serious, responsible. that was okay with me.