This Time Around

"The standing of this foundation!" Catherine continued her onslaught and Satan waltzed in.

"Can we just stop?!" Addison's voice floated above Catherine's snarling and she continued without paying any mind to the older woman's gawking. "For a minute. A woman just lost her pregnancy. A pregnancy that she fought for with everything that she had left in her body." She felt the lump in her throat, heard the way her strangled voice was coming out but ignored it. "Through grief, through pain, through loss." Her eyes stung with tears but she didn't care. "She fought and she lost her pregnancy. Can we just take a moment and... honor her? Just a moment to honor Tovah?"

Catherine and Richard quieted down while Meredith's eyes grew glossy with unshed tears. Addison's hands began to tremble and she could feel the pain in her chest intensify. She shook her head at her teacher and his very impertinent wife before storming away as far as she possibly could because right now she needed to be away. Away from the insensitive people in this hospital, from the silly idiots who put everything else above what people needed. She needed to be away. To find a place where no one could see her break as she needed to at the moment.

***

As she stepped outside the scrub room she noticed the busy hallway. Doctors, nurses, and orderlies strolling about too busy and unaware of the happenings in her OR. They didn't have to know but their obliviousness only made her anger and frustration worsen. She really needed to go, to find somewhere hidden where she could let go, or maybe someone to point her in the direction of such a place. But right now there was no one. No Derek, or Bailey, or Mark, or Callie. Amelia was stuck in surgery so no Amelia either. She was starting to feel as if she was drowning while she tried to suppress her tears and everything she felt.

"Addison."

A voice cut through the turmoil much like it had done so many times today, much like it always did. She spun to find Meredith, eyes still glossy, full of sadness and worry.

"I n-need to go. Please I need a p-place." The words continued to get caught on the lump in her throat. "I-I need..."

"Cristina showed me this one spot. I've only been there once but I know it'll help." Meredith said, quickly extending her hand towards her.

Addison hesitated for a fraction of a second before she took the blonde's hand, allowing her to guide her through the halls. They went every which way, taking the stairs instead of the elevator to avoid inquiring and inopportune eyes. She blatantly ignored the warmth and swirl of useless butterflies when she noticed how perfect her hand looked inside of Meredith's.

They stopped in front of a door with a weird utility sign on it. She frowned and tugged at Meredith's hand, confused as to why they were there.

"Come on." Meredith sent a small smile her way.

"But—" She tried.

"Let's go, Addie." Meredith insisted, opening the door and pulling her in, her brain a bit scrambled at the blonde using her nickname.

The door shut and she snapped out of her short trance, taking in her surroundings. It was a somewhat small place, full of pipes and valves. The dim light shining between the blades of the industrial fan. The buzz of flowing water and air flooded the whole place while puffs of steam rose from different pipes.

"Meredith, what the—" She began.

"It's ok, Addison. Come on. Stand here." Meredith interrupted pulling her towards a drain.

"But—" She tried again.

"You asked me to bring you to a place." Meredith shrugged.

"When I said I needed a place I meant a place to sit down and relax, not some dark back room full of pipes." Addison said, still looking around. "I bet people have been murdered down here. Is that why you brought me here? Are you trying to kill me, Grey? That's a felony. You'll go to jail and I won't be able to write a letter this time around."