Same Mistakes [Sequel to max and me]

18. Wrong Idea

Danielle.

I sobbed uncontrollably. I'm not even going to lie. Tears streamed down my face as I wailed into the empty apartment. The tears dripped onto my light-yellow sweat-pants. I coughed, throat getting sore from my passionate cry. You never know how badly you want something until you can't have it.

I was fine not having Liam around. But when he said he'd consider re-joining the kids' and my life, I was relieved. Max, Madison and Megan were finally going to have their Father. A male role model in their lives. But I guess I was wrong. All I have to offer the kids is an emotional mother.

I smacked over an orange & apple bowl that had been on the counter. The fruits flew across the apartment. Down the hall, into the living room, and into the dining room. I kicked the stupid wooden side-table from beside the sofa, which knocked over a blue, glass lamp. The lamp shattered on the ground. The glass shards flew across the hard-wood floor in all directions. Frustrated, I kicked the side-table again.

I sulked over to the wall, and leaned my forehead on it. I also pressed my hands to the wall, smacking it a few times. I then slid down the wall in the living room, until my butt hit the ground. I covered my eyes with my hands, sobbing into my palms. I hate that I can't give my children what they deserve. What they need. I don't know whey I gave Liam the benefit of the doubt in this situation. I should have known he wouldn't follow through. I should I known that Olivia was number 1 in his life. I should have know. I should have know he didn't care.

My sobs got louder, and my face got wetter. I sniffled loudly, before letting out an angry squeal. I put my face in my knees, and began rocking back and forth. My arms wrapped around my legs, keeping my body wrapped in a ball. I heard a few noises by the front door, but decided it was just the cats.

Why can't my life be easy? Why can't the kids' lives be easy? All I want is a good life for my kids. Max Ethan. Madison Jane. Megan Hope. God, you can do anything in the world to me. I just want a full, happy life for my children. Please God. I'll do anything for my children.

Madison.

"Thank-you Uncle Niall for the ride home," I said, smiling up at him. His blonde and brown hair was all scruffy and messy because I woke him up to take me home. "No problem, Maddie. I hope you feel better soon." Uncle Niall smiled at me. "Are you sure you're okay to head up to your apartment by yourself? Do you know your apartment number?" Uncle Niall asked, standing next to me by the elevator.

"I'll be okay, Uncle Niall. I'm a big girl. And yes, I do know my apartment number." I assured him. He smiled, ruffling my hair. "I'll see you later, squirt." He said, turning around. "Bye!" I yelled, waving. He laughed, pushing the door to go outside. I began tapping my foot and having a thumb-war with myself while I waited for the elevator to come down to the lobby. When it arrived, one lady climbed out.

I stepped inside the pretty decorated elevator, and pushed the button for our floor. Haha! Now I don't have to fight with my annoying brother about who gets to push the elevator button. I bet he's so jealous. The doors closed, and I began moving up to our floor. I'm the only one in the elevator. Its like my own, cute, little, bedroom. My tummy really hurts, and I feel like I might vomit. So I wanted to go home to my own bed.

Now my very pretty Mom can give me feel-better snuggles and medicine. Maybe she will make me warm soup and we can watch a movie together on the sofa. I sat down on the elevator floor, while it moved up. I don't like the weird feeling the elevator gives me when it's moving up or down. Especially when my tummy is hurting like this. Its making my tummy hurt even more then it did, before.

Finally, after a long ride, the elevator reached the right floor. I stood up with my backpack in my hand, and stepped out of the elevator. I began walking down to our door. I unzipped my pink backpack as I walked, and took out my house-key that Mum gave me. She said it might come in handy.

I re-put my backpack on, and put the key into the door. When I was about to turn the lock, I heard really loud cries from inside our apartment. I stopped messing with the key, and pressed my ear to the door. Someone is crying. Loudly. Its probably Mum... She's been upset a whole lot lately.

I can't bother her with my stomach-ache. Apparently she's not feeling well, either. I'll just go to bed. I slowly turned the key, trying to stay quiet. I pushed the door open, and stepped inside onto the welcome mat. The first thing I was a broken lamp in pieces by the coffee-table. Mum probably knocked it down.

Then I saw a bowl of oranges and apples spilled over the ground. My eyes flicked around the room, until I saw Mum leaning against the living room wall in her sweat-pants and pink t-shirt that Max and I made her for Mothers Day last year with the help of Auntie Eleanor and Uncle Louis.

Mum was wrapped in a little ball. Her head was between her knees, and she was rocking back and forth. She was having choke-cries. I put my backpack on the ground, making a little thud sound. Mum didn't even notice. I quietly closed the front door behind me, and kicked off my boots.

I looked at Mum again. Her hair was in all directions. Her body was surrounded by pieces of the lamp. I felt tears well up in my own eyes. I hate seeing Mum when she's hurt and sad. It seems she has been upset a lot lately... I hope I didn't do anything to make her sad. I stood there for a few moments, staring at my Mother. She is such a good Mum, but I don't think she knows it. I need to do something special for her.