midnight warmth

my name is whatever you decide

Your birthday is near, two days in fact, and your boyfriend is quiet. Jisung is usually beaming on these kinds of days for you and you'd always be excited despite your anxiousness for your birthday. He reminds you of how you are loved, how you are special and showers you with gifts you refuse to take. 

But he's unusually quiet now; impassive even. His texts in the morning isn't as cheery as it would be; he doesn't hold your hand in the halls anymore; he doesn't walk you to class anymore (for this, he seems to have a plausible reason—he's stowed by his classmate, Hyunjin); and more importantly, he doesn't include the 'I' in his 'I love you' anymore. How absurd, isn't it? You didn't mind it at first, but it gradually got worse as the week went by. 

Now, you lay in your bed, wondering if you've done something wrong. You think, had I said something? Is it because he's tired of keeping up with my anxiousness? and then you whine into your pillow, frustrated and confused at your suddenly-distant-boyfriend. You almost sense a birthday break up incoming. Rolling over to your side, you reach for your phone on the nightstand, seeing no texts nor calls from Jisung and you groan as you sit upright, opening his chatroom. You decide to break the ice; it has been four days since your last conversation with him—if you can put it that way—and you can't help it. You're dying to know what's up with him. 

07:41 PM | You:
Jisung?

To your surprise, he responds in a second.

07:41 PM | Jisung:
Hey sweetheart

You scoff at his nickname for you. "Sweetheart? You weren't so sweet lately." You grit your teeth and start typing.

07:42 PM | You:
I was wondering if there's something wrong.
You seemed really distant this week

07:44 PM | Jisung:
Yeah, sorry, you know how exams are
I'm also a little stressed out, my parents.. you get the gist.

07:44 PM | You:
I get it but..
You should've told me.
Am I not your girlfriend? :(

07:45 PM | Jisung:
Of course you are, Y/N. My dearest.
My future wife even.

07:45 PM | You:
Oh stfu

07:45 PM | Jisung:
Hey, I'm not lying when I said I'll marry you

07:46 PM | You:
Hmph
I know :>

07:46 PM | Jisung:
Good :)
I didn't want you worried. Your birthday is soon and I want you relaxed.

Unknowingly, your lips stretch into a sheepish grin, but you shake your head. No, you can't steer the subject away, Jisung. I won't allow you.

07:47 PM | You:
Yeah right
I'm more relaxed when you tell me what's wrong, dummy

07:47 PM | Jisung:
Nothing is wrong.
Everything's actually going so well. ;)
I'm preparing a surprise for you, so just sit tightly and wait okay?
Oh I gotta go, love you babe.

07:47 PM | You:
....
You're not getting away with this. I love you. Bye.

With a reassured smile, you turn the device off and lay in your bed once more; not to whine, but to giggle and squeal into your pillows now. No matter how many years it has been, you are still smitten by him, affected with every single thing he does to you and you wonder whether you own yourself anymore. You sigh a satisfied one, I'm helpless. Your lingering smile reaches your eyes, and then you fall asleep.